Questions for Week Number Forty-Three:

From the Curious as a Cat blog...


Name one event that changed your relationship with your family the most?
Coming out as a transsexual, their brother/uncle becoming their sister/aunt, yup that is kind of hard to top.

What is your favorite smell?
The sent of pine, this time of the year.

TEN THINGS TRANSGENDER PERSONS SHOULD DISCUSS WITH THEIR HEALTH CARE PROVIDERS

I came across this web-site and I thought that it was worth sharing. It brings up several important issues that we as trans should be made aware of.

From the Gay and Lesbian Medical Association Web-site.........

Following are the health issues GLMA’s healthcare providers have identified as most commonly of concern for transgender persons. While not all of these items apply to everyone, it’s wise to be aware of these issues.

1. Access to Health Care
Transgender persons are often reluctant to seek medical care through a traditional provider-patient relationship. Some are even turned away by providers. A doctor who refuses to treat a trans person may be acting out of fear and transphobia, or may have a religious bias against GLBT patients. It’s also possible that the doctor simply doesn’t have the knowledge or experience he needs. Furthermore, health care related to transgender issues is usually not covered by insurance, so it is more expensive. Whatever the reasons, transgender people have sometimes become very ill because they were afraid to visit their providers.

This is a real issue in my life, many times when I was very sick, I put off going to the doctor because I was afraid he might comment about my shaved body or my painted toenails.

2. Health History
Trans persons may hide important details of their health history from their doctors. Perhaps they fear being denied care if their history is known. Even many years after surgery, they may omit the history of their transition when seeing a new provider. Patients should see their provider as an equal partner in their health care, not as a gatekeeper or an obstacle to be overcome.

This is another issue that bothers me, I have an eye doctor appointment coming up in December and once again I will have to explain why I am taking Estradiol, the same is true when I visit my dentist in January. It is a never ending process of coming out.

3. Hormones
Cross-gender hormone therapy gives desirable feminizing (or masculinizing) effects, but carries its own unique risks. Estrogen has the potential to increase the risk of blood clotting, high blood pressure, elevated blood sugar and water retention. Anti-androgens such as spironolactone can produce dehydration, low blood pressure, and electrolyte disturbances. Testosterone, especially when given orally or in high doses, carries the risk of liver damage. Hormone use should be appropriately monitored by the patient and provider. Some trans people tend to obtain hormones and other treatment through indirect means, bypassing the health care system. Taking hormones without supervision can result in doses too high or too low, with undesired results.

4. Cardiovascular Health
Trans persons may be at increased risk for heart attack or stroke, not only from hormone use but from cigarette smoking, obesity, hypertension, and failure to monitor cardiovascular risks. Trans women may fear that a provider who finds them at risk for cardiovascular disease will instruct them to stop their hormones, and so they do not seek medical attention even when they have early warning signs of heart disease or stroke.

5. Cancer
Hormone-related cancer (breast in trans women, liver in women or men) is very rare but should be included in health screening. A greater worry is cancer of the reproductive organs. Trans men who have not had removal of the uterus, ovaries, or breasts are still at risk to develop cancer of these organs. Trans women remain at risk, although low, for cancer of the prostate. Furthermore, some providers are uncomfortable with treating such cancers in trans people. Some cases have been reported in which persons delay seeking treatment, or are refused treatment, until the cancer has spread.

6. STDs and Safe Sex
Trans people, especially youth, may be rejected by their families and find themselves homeless. They may be forced into sex work to make a living, and therefore at high risk for STDs including HIV. Other trans people may practice unsafe sex when they are beginning to experience sexuality in their desired gender. Safe sex is still possible even in transgender relationships.

7. Alcohol and Tobacco
Alcohol abuse is common in transgender people who experience family and social rejection, and the depression which accompanies such rejection. Alcohol combined with sex hormone administration increases the risk of liver damage. Tobacco use is high among all trans persons, especially those who use tobacco to maintain weight loss. Risks of heart attack and stroke are increased in persons who smoke tobacco and take estrogen or testosterone.

8. Depression/Anxiety
For many reasons, trans people are particularly prone to depression and anxiety. In addition to loss of family and friends, they face job stress and the risk of unemployment. Trans people who have not transitioned and remain in their birth gender are very prone to depression and anxiety. Suicide is a risk, both prior to transition and afterward. One of the most important aspects of the transgender therapy relationship is management of depression and/or anxiety.

Another one I worry about because of all the stress that being trans causes. Worrying about the fellow employees finding about me, worrying about telling my family, worrying about..... I could go on and on.

9. Injectable Silicone
Some trans women want physical feminization without having to wait for the effects of estrogen. They expect injectable silicone to give them “instant curves.” The silicone, often administered at “pumping parties” by non-medical persons, may migrate in the tissues and cause disfigurement years later. It is usually not medical grade, may contain many contaminants, and is often injected using a shared needle. Hepatitis may be spread through use of such needles.

10. Fitness (Diet & Exercise)
Many trans people are sedentary and overweight. Exercise is not a priority, and they may be working long hours to support their transitions. A healthy diet and a frequent exercise routine are just as important for trans persons as for the public. Exercise prior to sex reassignment surgery will reduce a person’s operative risk and promote faster recovery.

Author: Rebecca A. Allison, MD, Board of Directors, GLMA, Harry Benjamin International Gender Dysphoria Association, Interventional Cardiologist, Phoenix, Arizona

By the Way Sunday

~What Not to Wear~

By the way...

What clothing items do you insist on keeping around even though you know you'll never where them?
Oh yes, there is always hope that I will be able to fit back into them someday

Is there anything in your closet that is just too tacky to wear in public?
Yes again, there is this Indian Sarong that I just “had to have”, I never wore it one in public.

Do you wear it anyway?
No, it is just not me.

Are there any past styles that you wish would never make a return?
I have an old fifty’s style jumper that would be neat if it ever came back into style.

Currently, what two items do you need to make your wardrobe complete?
I need more casual tops to wear with jeans or a denim skirt.

Saturday 6

Episode 135

1. On a scale of one to ten, with ten being very pleased/enthusiastic and one being very unhappy/depressed, how would you rate your feelings on Democrats taking control of Congress?

10+ but I don’t think that there we be much change on important issues.

2. The Democrats have been, naturally, very critical of the Bush administration and the course the country has taken. How effectively do you believe that they can turn things around by the 2008 election?

I hope very effective, I think if the run Sen. John Edwards that they will have the bet chance yet to gain the Presidency back.

3. What would you rather have for breakfast: a) Ham & eggs with toast b) Grits and sausage c) Pancakes and Syrup

Ham and eggs but with hash browns and bacon.

4. Take the quiz: Are you too negative?

Are you too negative?
Way Positive You're a complete ray of sunshine that shines down on those around you. You're totally able, volunteer for even the more daunting tasks in life, and can always see the positive side of things. Some people call you hoplessly optimistic, but really your positive attitude makes much of what you do possible. Where other scoff, you merely take your way of life in stride and
Take The Quiz Now!	Quizzes by myYearbook.com

5. How likely are you to change your view of things based on your answer?
No I think that it is right on the money. But it was kind of a simplistic quiz.

6. You are serving as a juror in a murder trial. The defense team is claiming that a woman killed her own child while insane. As a juror, would you consider it critical information to know how soon she might be "back on the street" if found Not Guilty by Reason of Insanity, or would this have no bearing on your verdict?

I would hope it didn’t have an affect on my verdict, I believe we should judge on the crime at hand, not what they might do.

Friday Fill-In

From fondofsnape blog

1. Do you have any plants?

Yes, I have a few plants around the house especially in my atrium, now if only I remember to water them.

2. Do you like any of the Starbucks holiday lattes - Pumpkin Spice, Gingerbread latte, Mint Mocha, etc?

No, I am a tea drinker, I rarely have coffee and when I do it is decafe.

3. What magazines do you subscribe to?

I subscribe to PCPhoto and Yankee magazines.

4. If you could grant one person one wish this upcoming holiday season what would it be and why?

A friend has been disowned by my friend’s family; I would make a wish that my friend’s family would accept my friend back into the family.

5. If you had a magic wand what would be the first thing you’d use it on?

Oh, that is a hard question. There are so many things that I want to do in life that it would be hard to pick just one and I wouldn’t want to use it for any physical pleasures but to help remove suffering and oppression.

6. What are you looking forward to most this weekend?

Today I am going to a support group and then we usually go out to dinner somewhere afterwards. Tomorrow, I am trying to talk some friend into to going to the Wadsworth Atheneum or the New Britain Museum of American Art.
The Wadsworth has an exhibit on the Hudson School of Art that I want to see and the New Britain Museum of American Art ihave never been to so I would like to go there some time.

Five on Friday

Make a Wish

1. When is your birthday?
Just about one month ago.

2. When you blow out the candles on your cake, do you make a wish? Have any of them come true?
They need a permit from the fire department if they light all my candles now and I think you all can guess what I wished for when I was little. And it is coming true in about a year.

3. How do you feel about birthdays and birthday celebrations?
The older you get the more it becomes just another day.

4. What has been your favorite birthday gift? What kind of gifts really blow you away?
When my brother and his wife took me out to dinner. Gifts from the heart.

5. What flavor cake do you prefer?
Chocolate ice cream cake.

Friday Five

From the Friday Five blog.


1) If you had to move 100 miles or more to the north, east, west, or south, which would you choose, where would you end up, and what's so great about there?
Definitely not east, I can’t tread water that long. If I have to move I would move 100 miles north to Maine to be near my brother and his wife.

2) Do you have a favorite stretch of highway or byway for driving, touring, or wandering?
The corner of Northwest Connecticut, Southwest Massachusetts and Duchess Country New York is my favorite driving area. When I use to go back to college in Rochester once I got pasted Winsted, I use to light up a joint, put in the “The Grateful Dead” “American Rose” tape and crank up the eight track.

3) Are you happier to start a trip or return home?
Both, I am happy once I get on the road, to finally be underway; but it is always nice once you start heading home.

4) Plane, train, automobile, bicycle, or foot?
Train or automobile. I hate planes and bicycle and foot are too much work. However; I do like to hike and try to get away and hike for at least two hours a week. In my college days I use to backpack and the longest hike I went on was 25 miles in two days carrying a 65 pound backpack.

5) Do you overplan or underplan your travels? (Assume that "no" is not a valid answer.)
I overplan, it is better to have too much clothes or plan on doing too many things than not having enough. It is easy to cut things out than add then to the itinerary.

FOUR FOR FRIDAY

Q1 - Iraq: On Monday, British Prime Minister Tony Blair said he opposed the death penalty for former Iraqi President Saddam Hussein but that his trial had reminded the world of the deposed leader's brutality. Even if Hussein loses his appeal and dies on the gallows, it probably will have little effect on the future of Iraq, experts say. What do you think...should Saddam Hussein's death penalty be carried out, and if so, what kind of impact do you think it will have in the U.S. action in Iraq?
I normally do not believe in the death penalty, but this is hard to say no to. There is no doubt that he is guilty of mass murder, but will his death be revenge or justice? Also his death may make him a martyr. So my vote is no, I would give him life with no parole.

Q2 - College: If you went to college, did you learn more from the social or academic aspects of the experience? If you didn't go to college, do you wish you had?
I was in college to keep out of the draft. My major was electrical engineering so I was what you might call today a Geek, but at the same time I was also a hippie who did just about every drug going on weekends. However, I am going back to college and this time I will be more aware of the social aspects of college.

Q3 - Life and Religion: A friend's teenage son recently said that one of the problems he has with fundamental religion is that it teaches that we are all bad and that we are only going to be rewarded if we make all the right choices and do all the right things. He then said, "Life isn't the test; it's a time for learning." Your thoughts?
I believe that he is one hundred percent right. We all make mistakes; it is how we fix our mistakes that count. I do not believe that God is a malice God but a benevolent God.

Q4 - Whodunit: If you could solve any unsolved crime in history (or prove with certainty that a particular crime was incorrectly solved, and resolve it), which one would you choose?
Either who killed Kennedy or King, what is the real truth in the killings. Do they act alone or we there others involved?

Thursday's Poem

I was busy yesterday (See below) and didn’t get a chance to post my Thursday Poem, so here it is a day late.
Teach Your Child

I read Ann Landers the other day.
It was about transsexuals and bathrooms.
The mother saw hate.
The child saw innocence.
The mother was a good Christian woman.
The child preached love.
The old sage preached understanding.
Why do we teach our children to hate?
Why don’t we teach them to love?

Please Allow Me to Blow My Own Horn for a Moment

As most of you know I do a lot of volunteer work, well the other day I got an email from the director of Connecticut TransAdvocacy Coalition of which I am on the Board. Well she asked if I could fill in for her at a reception and give a short speech at the University of Connecticut, I said yes. What she didn’t say was that there was an award of recognition that I would be getting.



I am quite honored to have received it and that they thought to offer it to me.

The Party’s Over!

Well Lamont, who I was working as a volunteer for since July, lost the election to Lieberman.
So what did I get out of volunteering?

• I got a sense of making a difference, that even though he didn’t win, there were more new voter registrations than ever before, they had more people register as Democrats then ever before and yesterday was one of the largest midterm election voter turn-out ever.
• I met a lot of new people, made new contacts and a lot of people met a transsexual for the first time.
• I learned that there are a lot nice people out there who will stop and talk to you, a stranger, on the phone about who and why they are voting for someone. And there are far fewer rude people out there than you would expect.
• I learned that I hate working in a phone bank, that I don’t like making political phone calls any more than I like receiving them.
• I learned that I don’t want to work for a campaign any more.

All in all it was a very good learning experience.

Tuesday Twosome

Election Day (US)

1. Are you registered to vote? Explain why you are or are not registered to vote?
I am. Because I feel that it is your duty as a citizen to be a informed voter and also if you are going to complain about our government, then you better have voted.

2. Did you vote early (if your state offers this) or are you voting on election day?
I voted after work, snuck out a little early to beat the rush. If I can get to the polls I rather vote in person.

3. Do you truly believe your vote counts or are you not convinced that "every vote counts"?
If you mean physically counts, I do believe that my vote counts, there have been very little election problems in Connecticut. And if you mean, does it make a difference in the out come of an election, I also believe that it does. It is especially true in a tight election where a difference of a few vote can swing the election

4. Did you make up your mind about what candidates to vote for a while back or within the last two weeks?
I worked for the senatorial candidate since the primary (He lost in the election.). I try to keep up-to-date on how they have voted on issues, the Sunday paper prints a summary of the how our politicians voted for the week.

5. Compared to your parents’ views, are you voting the same as or different from them? Are you more liberal or conservative than them?
I am the product of the sixties! I am very liberal (I don’t think you could tell, could you?) and my parents were conservatives (My father was an ex-army officer and ex-high school principal).

Let the Voting Begin

I just got back from Lamont’s West Hartford office, things were rather hectic there as you could imagine; but they had nothing for me to do since they stopped the phone banks yesterday. So I you are getting robocalls they are not from the Lamont’s campaign.
I think Lamont has a slim chance to win, he is down in the polls by twelve points so it going to be an up hill battle. But hey! Who knows, he just might pull it off.
Why, was I backing Lamont? Because I didn’t like the way Lieberman voted on the Cheney Energy Bill. I didn’t like the way he voted on Terri Schiavo case and lastly I didn’t like him voting for John Roberts as the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court. Lamont would have voted against these issues and also I liked Lamont’s stand on Marriage Equality & LGBT Issues.
So I got my fingers crossed.
P.S. As I was writing this I just got a robocall from New York City Mayor Bloomberg telling to vote for Lieberman :-(

Manic Monday

From Manic Monday blog.

Could you ever be in love with someone you knew you couldn't trust?
No, I don’t think so. You have to have trust in a relationship in order to build a strong committed relationship.

Would you rather have a strikingly attractive spouse who was disappointing in bed or a plain-looking spouse who was fantastic?
Neither, I rather have someone whom I can love and they can love me. Sex is secondary and looks comes in way down the list.

Is it easier for men or women to find good partners?
I think everyone has a hard time finding a good partner, but try being a trans-woman who loves women. It is hundreds of times harder.

If you could spend one night with anyone in the world you desired, but only by getting permission from your partner, would you ask for it?
No, I believe in being faithful to your commitments. So that question would never come up.

If you found your true love, how long would you wait for him/her to return your love?
That is a hard question to answer; it would really depend on the circumstances. I don’t think you can give a hard and fast answer.

The Season’s First Snow!

I was up at the cottage putting in the heat to the next addition this weekend and when I had to run down to the hardware store (10 miles into town) I went through a heavy snow squaw that covered everything white before it quickly melted away.
Winter is knocking at the door, the ponds had a thin covering of ice and wood smoke was in the air. As you looked out across the grey fields at the farm houses; many of the chimneys had a thin column of smoke rising up and drifting across the fields. The scene looked like something out of a Curries and Ives painting. I wish I had my camera, but alas it was back in the cottage.

FOUR FOR FRIDAY

Q1 - Faith: Nearly half of all Americans are not sure God exists, according to a poll that also found divisions among the public on whether God is male or female or whether God has a human form and has control over individual or worldly events. The survey conducted by Harris Poll found that 42 percent of U.S. adults are not "absolutely certain" there is a God compared to 34 percent who felt that way when asked the same question three years ago. What do you think? Does God exist, and if so, do you think God has control over events?Yes, I think that God exists. All you have to do is look around you and see all of the beauty, all of the variety and all of the diversity. Sit by a quit pond, climb a mountain or look out at a crowd at a football game and see the wonders of life around us.

Q2 - Work: Do you socialize with co-workers outside of the office?No, I keep my personal life separate from my professional life.

Q3 - Holiday Travel: Are you traveling for the upcoming holidays or are you expecting family and friends to come to your home for Thanksgiving and/or Christmas?Normally I travel to a relative but this year they are all coming to my house (What have I gotten myself into! I have been making lists of what I have to do, lists of what we are having for dinner, who is bring what…..)

Q4 - You Choose: Which would you rather have...a personal assistant or a personal trainer?A personal assistant, I need someone to keep me organized and to run earns for me.

Thursday Poem

Since Tuesday was Halloween I thought a kind of spooky poem was in order....

* * * * *
The Haunted Forest
Running, running.
Aimlessly through the dark.
With shafts of light piercing the dark here and there.
Goblins and bogeymen reaching out grabbing at you.
You stop and listen to noises in the dark.
Running, running.
Bumping into objects in the dark.
A woman puts out a hand and says, “I can help follow me.”
You fearfully follow her towards the light.
She leads you to an open meadow, filled with flowers, butterflies and birds singing.

Walking through the woods sunlight shine through the leaves.
Walking through the woods branches grabbing at my jacket.
Walking through the woods squirrels scamper in the leaves on the ground.
Walking through the woods, you see a person running wildly.
You stop and say, “I can help, I know the way, follow me to the light.”

Thursday Threesome

::Off to see the wizard::


Onesome: Off-- to do something productive? What are your spare time hobbies? ...or do you have a life {g}?
Photography and doing volunteer work.


Twosome: to see-- beyond the horizon? Where would you like to take your hypothetical 'unlimited' vacation?
I would like to sail around the world in my own sailboat, visiting exotic ports of call.

Threesome: the Wizard-- There's always (or should be) a fix-it wizard around the place; do you have one you can call on to take care of those minor repairs that crop up? ...or are you "it"?
I am lousy at fixing things around the house and would like to call someone to fix it, but most of the time I end up fixing it or at least trying to fix it.

3x Thursday

Boys and Girls and Fashion

1. Are you in to clothes and fashion? Does it matter to you? Why/why not?
I am comfortable in jeans and sneakers. But, when I am doing volunteer work, I dress causal and try to blend in.

2. Girls: Do you wear heels? Why/why not? Are they comfortable? Guys: What's your take on dressing up in suits and ties?
I don't wear heels except when the occasion calls for it like a cocktail party or a semiformal dinner or a fancy restaurant. I only wear 2 ½” heels, if it is only for a couple of hours and they fit right then they are not so bad.

3. What do you think of these people today who wear their jeans on their asses? You know, boxers sticking 3/4 of the way out...wearing a 40 waist when it should be a 32. Do you think it's becoming? Do you care? Why/why not?
Hey, when I was a teenager I though I looked cool. I had long hair, beard and wore old jeans, old army shirt and boots… the typical hippie look.

Bonus Question: Do you like to get dressed up? Why/why not?
Once in awhile I don’t mind getting dressed up to a special occasion for a couple of hours. Going out to a play at the Bushnell Theater and a nice restaurant afterward or going to a semiformal fundraiser. Why? Because it fun to do once in awhile.

My Nephew and His Wife met Diana for the First Time

I was out to a meeting tonight and when I got home the message light on my answering machine was blinking. It was my nephew and they were stopping by to drop off their station wagon for me to use to bring some stuff up to New Hampshire. I just got finished listen to the message when they drove in. So I called them and told them I was dressed as Diana and if they didn’t want to see me as Diana, I would stay inside, but they said it was OK.
It was anticlimactic; however, it was another milestone.