Marriage Before Non-Discrimination?

I have written many times before that I think the focus should be on non-discrimination laws before marriage equality. I feel that it is more important to have a job, a roof over your head and to be able to walk in and sit at a lunch counter than to be able to be married.

Refusal to sell wedding gowns to lesbian couple stirs debate in Bloomsburg
August 8, 2014
Associated Press

BLOOMSBURG — A bridal store’s refusal to sell wedding gowns to a same-sex couple is stirring debate in central Pennsylvania.
[…]
W.W. Bridal Boutique owner Victoria Miller told the newspaper that “providing those two girls dresses for a sanctified marriage would break God’s law.”

The woman’s discrimination is completely legal in Pennsylvania and your landlord can throw you out of your apartment when you announce your marriage. This is why I feel it is important to have non-discrimination laws first.

The town council is now considering a non-discrimination ordinance; however, the state offers no protection against discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity other than an executive order from the governor banning discrimination in employment. I’m not sure if the governor’s order covers businesses that do business with the state or if it covers all businesses.

Marriage was a low hanging fruit but what it really get you is a chance to be fired, thrown out on the street in many of the states that overturned the marriage laws.

A Piece Of Cake!

Who knew that "Death Of Free Enterprise" would be over a cake! Well that is the cry of the conservative press about an administrative law judge’s ruling out in Colorado against the Masterpiece Cakeshop.

According to Media Matters Fox News said,

Fox's Elisabeth Hasselbeck interviewed the owner of a Colorado bakery who was recently found to have violated the state's non-discrimination law by refusing to make a cake for a same-sex wedding, asking if he believed his rights had been violated by efforts to prohibit anti-LGBT discrimination.

During the December 10 edition of Fox & Friends, Hasselbeck invited Jack Phillips, owner of Masterpiece Cakeshop in Denver, to discuss a recent ruling by a Colorado judge that found that Phillips had violated that state's law against discrimination when he refused to serve a same-sex couple. Phillips was joined by his attorney Nicolle Martin, who does volunteer work at the Alliance Defending Freedom (ADF), a group notorious for pushing for the criminalization of homosexuality internationally.

During the segment - which featured a graphic declaring "The Death Of Free Enterprise" - Hasselbeck asked Phillips why he believed he shouldn't have to abandon his "personal religious beliefs just to make a buck"

The Washington Times in an editorial said,

A Colorado court is making it a crime to refuse to cater to militant homosexual activists. Judge Robert N. Spencer held on Friday that a bakery owner who, citing his Christian religious beliefs, wouldn’t bake a wedding cake for a homosexual couple must “cease and desist from discriminating” or pay fines so large that he’d go out of business.

In this clash of values, the religiously observant are relegated to the back of the legal bus. In Judge Spencer’s view, the First Amendment’s protection of freedom of religion must give way to a state anti-discrimination law, even though the Colorado Constitution clearly states, “Only a union of one man and one woman shall be valid or recognized as marriage in this state.” The plaintiffs, Charlie Craig and David Mullins, were “married” in Massachusetts, where another court declared such unions to be legal. The couple had demanded that Jack Phillips, owner of the Masterpiece Cakeshop in Lakewood, produce a cake for a July 2012 reception in Colorado.

Over and over we hear the cry of “religious freedom” to discriminate, how anti-discrimination laws are forcing people to violate their religious beliefs. According to Think Progress, the judge in the case said this about the claim of religious freedom…

Though Phillips objected to providing the cake on religious grounds, the ALJ pointed out that baking a cake is not actually conduct that is part of his religion. Thus, it does not qualify for exemption from regulation:

    Respondents’ refusal to provide a cake for Complainants’ same-sex wedding is distinctly the type of conduct that the Supreme Court has repeatedly found subject to legitimate regulation. Such discrimination is against the law; it adversely affects the rights of Complainants to be free from discrimination in the marketplace; and the impact upon Respondents is incidental to the state’s legitimate regulation of commercial activity. Respondents therefore have no valid claim that barring them from discriminating against same-sex customers violates their right to free exercise of religion. Conceptually, Respondents’ refusal to serve a same-sex couple due to religious objection to same-sex weddings is no different from refusing to serve a biracial couple because of religious objection to biracial marriage. However, that argument was struck down long ago in Bob Jones Univ. v. United States.

As I said before in other blog posts, substitute any other protective class for sexual orientation and ask your self would it be okay to discriminate? Would it be alright not to serve a black person, after all the Bible was used to justified segregation in the South? What if he refused to sell a cake to a Muslim or a Jew?

On The Road Days 10 & 11 – Home! Home At Last!

Yesterday I found out that the repair shop ordered the wrong part to fix the transmission on my cousin’s van and that it would not be ready until sometime Friday. Since I had to go to meet people on Friday to pick up material for Saturday’s Fairfield County Pride in Norwalk and also I would run out of my meds Thursday night, I rented a car to drive home. I left Asheville at 11:00AM and I arrived at my niece’s house in central New Jersey at 10:30PM. I left her house at 7:10AM and I made it to the rental place at Bradley airport at 10:50AM, so I was charged only for one day’s rental. Now I’m waiting for my cousin’s husband to pick me up and bring me to his house so that I can be reunited with my car.

The only bummer was that I didn’t check out the car first and when I got to Bradley, they found a scratch on the side if the car.

Overall I enjoyed the trip, even though it cost me twice what I budgeted. I thought the Smithsonian Air and Space museum was great and I glad that we went, it was well worth the price (it’s free).

I liked the day trips along the Blue Ridge Parkway that I took; the scenery was breath taking, along with the drop-offs on the side of the road. On some of the sections of the highway, the only thing protected you from a thousand foot precipice was an old wooden guardrail. However, the first day’s trip to the Blue Ridge Parkway with the detour wasn’t that great, until the detour went through the Pisgah National Forest.

The wedding on Saturday was beautiful and the location was fantastic! The next day’s brunch with all the family was nice and so was going to Asheville for dinner. Asheville at ten o’clock at night on a Sunday was hopping.

Monday, the whole family got together again at my brother’s and sister-in-law’s rented house and we had a southern style barbeque. All of my brother’s and sister-in-law’s children and grandchildren were there and my cousin’s family were there.

I liked the Asheville area, but…
It seemed like once you got outside the city, all the road went up the side of mountains on winding roads. The distances on the map between the cabin that my cousin rented and the one my brother rented was only a couple of miles apart by straight line but many miles on switchback roads. The other thing that I didn’t like about Asheville was the heat and humidity, I do not tolerate heat and humidity. I was sitting outside Sunday night and sweat was running down my back.

Here are the links for the trip...
Day One,
Day Four,
Day Five,
Day Six,
Day Seven,
Day Eight,
Day Nine.

On The Road Day 9

Yesterday there was no good news about the van; it looked like it was another day in Asheville, and so I headed off to the mountains. This time I drove north on the Blue Ridge Parkway.

The mountains down here are different from the mountains up north in that their slopes are steeper than the Berkshires, the Green or White mountains. Therefore, when you go up a mountain the road is all hairpin curves or switchbacks.

I stopped at three overlooks, at the Pounding Mill overlook; I took a panoramic view composed of five photos. It was a spur of the moment idea and I didn’t set the camera properly so you can see the seams of the photos.

These photos are from Craggy Mt. overlook and in one of the photographs you can see the tunnel through the mountain.



The last photo is of the overlook at Glassmine Falls.I got more bad news about the van, they ordered the wrong part and it will not be ready until Friday. Therefore, I’m looking into another way to get home. Maybe renting a car.

Day Ten & Eleven is here.

On The Road Day 8 – Good-byes

Yesterday was a day of good-byes. I went over to my brother and sister-in-law’s rental cabin and hung out there all day with the family. My niece and nephews and their spouses went to the Biltmore Estate and I stayed with my brother and sister-in-law and their grandkids at the cabin. It was 90+ degrees and the pool looked awful inviting, but I didn’t have a bathing suite. So a quick trip to the store fixed that and the water was SO good!

There were twenty-eight of us there at the cabin, eighteen adults and ten child, and we came from seven states. What was nice to watch, was the children. All the cousins playing together, their ages were from eight to three years old and they got along so good together. For dinner, my nephew and his brother-in-law cooked dinner, leftover BBQ beef brisket from the wedding and pork tender loins.

The repair place said that they would have the car ready by five and hopefully, it will be sooner. Therefore, we are going to have to drive through the night because my cousin’s husband is schoolteacher and he has to be back by 9:00AM tomorrow! I am not looking forward to the drive; I can’t sleep in a car. We have three drivers, so each of us will drive for four hours and with luck and no construction delays we should be there by seven in the morning.

Update 9:12AM The car will not be ready today, they have to replace the transmission! The worst part, is that I only have enough meds until Thursday. Lucky I brought two extra days of meds or I would have been out by now.

Day Nine is here.

On The Road Day 7

Yesterday, I went to a brunch at my nephew in-law’s restaurant, the Village Wayside Bar & Grill. Most of the people at the wedding were there and I said my good-bye to my family members who were heading home after the brunch. The restaurant is located in the Biltmore Village which are stores built in the architecture style of the 1890’s. The restaurant is in the old 1896 train station for the Biltmore Estates.

Afterward, we all headed up to my brother and sister-in-law’s rented house and the kids spent all day in the pool while the adults sat around talking. That was all brought to an abrupt stop when a passing downpour put a damper on the outside activity. It cooled down the temperature but the humidity went up.

For dinner, all fourteen of us headed in to Asheville. We ate at the Mellow Mushroom, an eclectic pizza joint and I had a Gourmet White pizza (sun-dried tomatoes, Provolone, Feta, Mozzarella, tomatoes and onions), it was delicious! After dinner, we walked around Asheville and ended up at Pack Square Park, along the way we passed these three guys holding up signs quoting the Bible about repenting. I wonder what they thought of me?

The people Asheville have been very friendly and I just love their southern accent. I like the Asheville area, there is so much to do here and the city was still hoping at ten o’clock at night. But the heat and humidity is just so oppressive that I would never like to live here.

As I said, the people are so friendly here, I interact with strangers mostly at breakfast in the lobby of the motel. The lobby is filled with families for breakfast, you have to wait in-line for the toaster and they all have been great. I pass from a distant, but up close, it is very easy to read me. However, in my favor is the fact that the last thing they would think is that I trans-person would be there at the motel for breakfast and also, they are absorbed with their family, therefore, I don’t get read.

Today, we learn when the van will be fixed and how long we have to stay in town. Hopefully, it will be fixed in time to get home on Friday. Friday I have to pick up the material for Saturday’s Fairfield Pride. I am suppose to work the table there and I have to pick up the material on Friday for the table.

Day Eight is here.

On The Road Day 6: The Wedding

Today’s main event was the wedding at 6:00PM, before that I went to house that my brother rented for his family in Weaverville, NC and stayed for a couple of hours before I went back to my motel room to change for the wedding.

The wedding was held at “The Fields of Blackberry Cove” in Weaverville, a couple of miles from my brother’s rental. The wedding was held outside in a field and it was a 90/90 day (90 degrees 90% humidity) and I slowly melted. The reception was in a converted barn in the field there and the meal was a southern Barbecue; BBQ pork ribs, BBQ beef brisket, BBQ Chicken salad, corn bread and sweet potatoes. As usual, I ate way too much.

I left around 9:30 and cranked the car air conditioner on high.

Day Seven is here.

On The Road Day 5

I’m glad I rented a car, it is nice to be able to get around on my own and not have to depend on others for a ride.

Yesterday, I wanted to drive along the Blue Ridge Parkway for about an hour and a half turn around and come back to the hotel. I packed a lunch and headed off for the mountains, but I quickly found out that the parkway was closed so I had to take a detour around the section that was closed. So I took the detour around the closure and the detour was over an hour long instead of a half hour drive along the parkway. The detour took me through Pisgah National Forest, it was a beautiful ride, but it was not the scenic parkway.

Once I got to the parkway, the view was breathtaking. There was a haze in the air from the humidity and it gave the mountains the bluish tint. Here are a few of the pictures that I took…

The Cold Mountain Overlook.

The Pounding Mill Overlook.

My rental car.
Later, I went over to my nephew’s future in-law’s bar and grill to join my brother and family. It is a nice little place on Lodge St. in Asheville.

I have been up since 4:00am! Just what I don't need today with the wedding this evening, at 6:00pm. By the time everyone starts to party, I would have been awake 14 hours. :-(

Day Six is here.

On The Road – Day 4

We are down in Asheville, NC for my nephew’s wedding, I came down with my cousin’s family and after we realized that the family is spread out all the Asheville area, I rented a Prius. In the evening I drove up to the cabin that my cousins are renting for the wedding, it is over 25 away up in the Blue Ridge Mountains on the edge of the Pisgah National Forest. The road up to their cabin in Barnardsville was crazy with hairpin curves that were so sharp, that the headlights didn’t show the road and it went up at a steep angle. This went on for over a mile, up and up the mountain.

Today, I will be going up to the cabin that my brother rented in Weaverville and tonight I think that we are planning on going to a concert in Asheville.

The only downside of the day was the motel day clerk, when I was meeting the guy from the rental car company in the lobby, the clerk questioned me about staying at the motel. She seemed a little incredulous that I was staying here. But as usual all my worrying about the ride down here and having to stop at rest areas was for nothing.

Day Five is here.

On The Road Again.

I’m down in Asheville, NC for the wedding of my cousin and on the way down we stopped at the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum, here are some of the photos…

John H. Glenn’s Mercury space capsule.

The command module of Apollo 11, the space flight where for the first time Man stepped on the moon.
The Space Shuttle…

The first turbine powered helicopter, Kaman K225. In the mid-seventies, for a summer job I worked at Kaman where this was made.
The “Enola Gay”, the B-29 that dropped the first atomic bomb on the city of Hiroshima Japan during World War II.


Day Four is here

Family Wedding

I just got back from the wedding up at Lake George. I had a great time, however, it was hard to say good-bye to the family. Some of them I will not see until the next wedding in the spring. It was very emotional for me; especial hard was the 3 ½ hour drive home by myself. Some of my family came from North Carolina, Colorado and California.

The wedding was held at the Diamond Point Community Church in Diamond Point NY the church was built 1879.
The reception was held at the Inn at Erlowest, an old Queen Anne style Stone Castle that was built for Mr. Edward Morse Shepard in 1898 and it is part of “Millionaires Row” in the Adirondack. It reminded me of the Newport Mansions.
Here are a couple of the tourist boats that cruise Lake George.

This is a the Reception Dinner...

Top Of The World

Yesterday, I went to the “Welcome Dinner” (AKA Rehearsal Dinner) for the wedding guests at the Farmhouse restaurant Top of the World. It was nice to see relatives that I haven’t seen in a number of years.