Tuesday, August 31, 2010

I Remember When – The 1955 Hurricane

There are hurricane watches all up and down the east coast today and the latest forecast has hurricane Elaine Earl off the New England coast Friday night. The first hurricane that I remember is the 1955 hurricane, Connie or it could have been Diane (they struck five days apart) and what stands out in my memory was how worried my parents were that day.

We were up in a cottage that we rented in New Hampshire when we heard about the hurricane (we were probably at the cottage that we rented on Lake Winnisquam and I was almost 7 years old) and at the time; we owned two houses, one down in Milford and the other in the town where I live now. We were in the process of moving and we still had both houses. In New Hampshire, we had high winds and heavy rains and a number of the roads were closed and it was worst the closer that you got to Connecticut.

I remember my father on the phone talking to the state police about how to get back home to Milford, we had to go north and over to Vermont and New York. In New York we drove down the Taconic Parkway and then over the Merit Parkway, crossing the Housatonic river in Stratford on one of the few bridges across the Housatonic that was passable. Our house in Milford was on a high bluff next to the river. I remember looking down at the river and seeing all the debris piled up on its banks, the little marina was gone, just the piling remained. There was still flotsam coming down the river and we were told that there were coffins from a cemetery up river that was washed away and the coffins had floated down the river.

Later, we took a trip up river to visit friends and family. My mother had family in Waterbury and we visited them. I remember seeing most of Waterbury destroyed from the floodwater, there are photographs and an article about the storm damage in Waterbury here. After we left Waterbury was drove up to Winsted. The whole center of the town was washed away, you can read their stories here.

Now when you drive around the Farmington, Naugatuck and Housatonic River valleys, if you know where to look you can still see the destruction that the hurricane caused (In New Hartford, there is the remains of dam that broke. In Unionville, the “Rails to Trails” path follows the old railroad tracks that were washed away.). Many of the flood control dams in the watersheds are a result of the ’55 Hurricane. There were other hurricanes that have hit Connecticut, but for me the benchmark is Hurricane Diane, they all will be compared to that.

Update 8/24/12: Added photograph, links to the state library & NOAA and hurricane Connie

Monday, August 30, 2010

Manic Monday #220

Lisa’s Manic Monday #220

What are the values you cherish even though they may run counter to societal values?
I think my values are the same as societal values, treat everyone with respect and dignity.

Mondays make me _feel that it is just another day when you are retired__.

If you were to publish a book about yourself, what would you title it?
It's a mixed up, muddle up, shook up world.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Saturday Six – Episode 333

Patrick’s Place Saturday Six – Episode 333

1. How old were you when you first started thinking seriously about what you wanted to do as a career?
I think it was around my freshman or junior year in high school. I remember when I was in class when I answered a question about what we wanted to do when we graduated from high school and I said an electrical engineer. The teacher chided me say I wasn’t smart enough to be an engineer… well in 2007 I retired after 35 years in electronics and of those 25 as a supervisor of a electronic test department.

2. How old were you when you built your first long-term friendship (even if the friendship is currently no longer intact)?

Second grade, I met a friend who shared my love of science. I have hardy heard from him once I transitioned.

3. Of the people you consider friends, how long is your longest-lasting friendship?
Well, that is a hard question for me to answer; I have to divide it into pre- and post- transition. My pre-transition friends said that they will still be friends but the Christmas cards have stopped coming, I have been invited to only one party since I transitioned. my post-transition friends I see all the time.

4. When is the last time you spoke to this person either by phone, email or online?
Pre-transition – 2008 when he was in an accident. Post-transition last week.

5. Take the quiz: What stage of development are you in?

You Are In Stage II

Even though you are far from being an actual toddler, you are in the toddler stage of development.
You are still figuring out how to be autonomous and independent in this world.
Sometimes you have trouble just being yourself. You can be a bit ashamed of who you are.
You struggle with impulsive and compulsive behavior. Willpower is a struggle for you.

6. The last question in the quiz asked which trait described you when you’re at your best. Which trait would you describes you at your worst?
A worrier.

I thought the whole quiz was for teens, with questions like the first question “Right now you are have trouble: Figuring out the meaning in life” All through out life you are trying to figure out the meaning of life and it is even more true once you retire. Or question three about when you feel bad you, they don’t have any positive answers like shrug it off and move on.

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Saturday 9: Little Miss Can't Be Wrong

Crazy Sam’s Saturday 9: Little Miss Can't Be Wrong

1. Who was the last person you dealt with that felt that they could never be wrong?
I not going to name manes, but yes I do know a person like that.

2. Tell us about one person who is the most like you.

There is no one like me in the whole world, I am a unique.

3. What is something you really want right now?
To win the lottery.

4. What are you doing this weekend?
Going to a support group today and then to visit a friend tomorrow.

5. Are you in a good mood? If yes, Why?
No, school starts in two weeks and my internship the following week. It is going to be hard to get back into the grove again.

6. Do you have an ex that you are pretty sure thinks about you a lot?
Nope, no ex.

7. What's one thing you wish you could do but can't?
Win the lottery.

8. What's one trait you hate in a person?
Constant talking and monopolizing the conversation.

9. What's one thing you like to do alone?


Friday, August 27, 2010

Friday Fill-ins #191

Janet’s Friday Fill-ins #191


1. You do your thing; I do mine and sometimes _and sometimes well see eye to eye_.

2. _Starting my internship in a couple of weeks_ is what's been on my mind on and off all day.

3. Remember when _is something that I have been doing a lot lately_.

4. _Lobster, chocolate and strawberries_ are three of my favorite obsessions :-)

5. During the last year _there has some highs and lows in my life_

6. _Looking at old family pictures_ puts a smile on my face.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to _going to my favorite coffee shop_, tomorrow my plans include _going to a support group_ and Sunday, I want to _maybe visit some friends_!

Thursday, August 26, 2010

My Story Part – 42 In Pictures

A few weeks ago I talked about cameras and the trans-community, well I have been going over some old pictures from when I first started going out to meetings. So I thought it would be cool to see how I progressed over time (it also got me out of a lot of writing.)…

The first picture down “Memory Lane” is from 1998, I was up our cottage on the deck by the water…

This picture is of me was taken in 1999 as I was getting ready to go out to a Connecticut Outreach Society’s meeting. It was from one of the first meetings that I ever attended…
The very first time in a public place was when I attended the 2000 COS Banquet…
In 2001, I was back out on my deck up at the lake…
In 2002, I was at the COS information table at the True Colors conference…
Also in 2002, I attended a First Event conference in Boston...
This picture was from the COS Banquet in 2003…
This picture is at my house at a 2004 New Year Eve Party, I just love the expression on my face! I wonder what I was Drinking.
Moving on to 2004, this picture was from the Real Arts Way’s Creative Cocktail Hour web-site…
I attended the Imperial Sovereign Court of All of Connecticut fundraiser at Chez Est in 2005…Moving on along to 2007, this picture was also from the Real Arts Way’s Creative Cocktail Hour and it was taken by Deja…
This picture was taken at the Northampton Pride in May of 2008; it was a cold and rainy day…
This picture was taken at Lobby Day in April of 2009. We were joking around at the podium in the hearing room that we had used for the Lobby Day…
And that brings us up to the picture taken by Stana last week when we dinned out before we went to the Real Arts Way’s Creative Cocktail Hour…
I think you can see the progression of my transition, from the shy girl just coming out to the confident woman who emerged.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

I'm a Woman with Male Chromosomes

I'm a Woman with Male Chromosomes
By Sophie Moura
Marie Claire

The year I was in fifth grade, I saw a television commercial for tampons. Like most 10-year-olds, I'd never heard of a tampon. But when I asked my mom what one was, she started crying.

How do you tell your daughter that she's never going to need tampons? That she won't get her period or have babies, and that those things are the least of what sets her apart?

From the outside, there was no sign that the little kid watching TV in a suburb of Pittsburgh was so different. I've always been girly — obsessed with dresses, sparkles, and the color pink, donning felt poodle skirts for Halloween and loving makeup.

What isn't obvious is that I have a rare condition called androgen insensitivity syndrome, or AIS. I was born with XY chromosomes, the combination found in boys. With AIS, an XY embryo doesn't respond to the crucial hormones that tell the penis and scrotum to form. At the earliest stage of life, my body missed those signals, and I developed as a girl, with a clitoris and vulva. But what's inside me doesn't match.

My parents learned this when I was 6. That year, I collapsed in the shower with a painful lump in my groin. Convinced I had a hernia, my parents, both doctors, rushed me to the hospital. But when surgeons operated (a hernia is tough to X-ray and needs to be fixed surgically), there was no twisted loop of intestine behind that bump. It was a testicle that had started descending. Across my abdomen, they found another one. The upper portion of my vagina, and my cervix, uterus, and fallopian tubes were missing.
That year, my sister came home from school with a biology project. Everyone in her class was assigned a condition to research, and she got AIS.

"Mom and Dad, it sounds a lot like Katie," she said at dinner one night. "And there's a woman with Mom's name on the support group website."
A month after that, we were holed up in his family's home near campus. I'd told two previous boyfriends about my AIS, so I launched into my usual spiel. Midway through, Sam stopped me — he already knew. A track teammate had approached him in the locker room after practice and said, "I heard you're dating Katie Baratz. Is it true she's really a guy?" Sam had known I'd tell him when I was ready.
Ultimately, I want to be an advocate for people like me. It's hard to convince doctors to change how they handle such cases if you're not their peer, so I'm in med school, and getting a master's in bioethics. I hope my degrees will give me street cred in the medical community, since this is what I'm meant to be doing. Talking about tampons doesn't have to lead to tears.
Read the whole article...its beautiful.


I agree with what Keith Olbermann is saying 100%. We need to stop this campaign of fear, hate and bigotry. We need to stop the drumming. We need to stop the mob mentality. We need to stop driving this wedge between us.

Republicans = Hate
Republicans = Fear
Republicans = Bigotry

Hate of Muslims
Fear of the Brown man
Bigotry against homosexuals and transgender people

The Republicans are using the Muslim Culture Center as a hot button issue to drum up voters in this fall’s elections. The center has been in planning for years, but now it is raised as an issue by the Republicans, Fox news and other conservative talk show host. Let us remember that our battle is with Al Qaeda and not with Muslims. When we make Muslims our enemy, we are playing right into the hands of Al Qaeda who are trying to make this a war against religion and not against terrorism.

Look at the ad that the GOP is running, it is purely inflammatory.

In a opinion piece in the Hartford Courant last Sunday, titled “Religious Wrongs: Demonization Leads To Persecution” the author, Atif Quraishi said,
Is it really about the Muslim cultural center proposed near Ground Zero in New York? About being sensitive to "hallowed ground"? I don't think so. The cultural center was merely an excuse to let loose the hate that has always been there. Bigotry is spreading and people are spewing hate so calmly and freely that it is scary.

People, powerful people — those who have influence over others. Those with followers: Newt, Hannity, O'Riley, Beck, Palin, my God! These are people with millions of followers. There are leaders emerging, leaders who are gathering these fearful and hate-filled masses and using powerful words to control them. Sound familiar?
I am opposed to the use of the hate and fear as a wedge to drive this country apart. I think it was a bad choice to build the culture center there, but the rhetoric that is being used is stirring up hate and bigotry for the sole purpose of getting votes in the fall election.

Ask yourself why is immigration an issue right now? When illegal immigration is actually declining, it is lower then when Bush was in office. So why is it an issue now! Could it be because a Democrat are in office? In another opinion piece, this time in the Arizona Republican, Gregory Rodriguez wrote back in July that,
Despite the heightened rhetoric and the bloodcurdling vitriol surrounding the issue, illegal immigration has actually declined significantly over the past few years. While journalists like to characterize the anger over immigration as a response to facts on the ground - i.e., people are inundated and incensed - the numbers don't bear them out.

In fact, the opposite is true. According to a February report by the Department of Homeland Security, the number of illegal immigrants living in the United States actually dropped by a whopping 1 million between 2008 and 2009, which amounts to the sharpest decrease in 30 years. It was the second year of declining numbers.

Likewise, the Border Patrol reports that apprehensions are down by more than 60 percent since 2000, to 550,000 last year, the lowest number in 35 years, even though the border is more tightly controlled than ever. As William Finnegan wrote in last week's New Yorker, "The southern border, far from being unsecured, is in better shape than it has been for years - better managed and less porous."

And there's more. Despite the drumbeat about hordes of undocumented Mexicans who have come north to take our jobs, consider this: According to the Pew Hispanic Center, between 2005 and 2008, the number of Mexican migrants arriving in the U.S. actually declined by 40 percent.
Why has immigration become an issue? Why are they stirring the fires of xenophobia? It is simply for VOTES!

There has been talk about amending the 14th Amendment to stop waves of pregnant women from coming here to have their babies on American soil that so they can be American citizens. Of Mexican women sneaking across the borders to give birth in American hospitals. However, where are their statistics? I haven’t been able to find any that has just the numbers for illegal immigrants and those here on tourist visa. The statistics are all lumped together with those who are have their Green Cards and are immigrating to the U.S.

Lastly, we all know the Republican’s position on LGBT issues, “If Gays are allowed to marry our whole society will crash” and they have continually opposed the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA) labeling it the “Bathroom Bill.” The Republicans use hate and fear to gather votes.

Instead of talking about hate, fear and bigotry, let us talk about the economy, jobs and how we are going to get out of this depression. We need to go out and vote this November to stop this hate. We need to send a clear message that we will not tolerate this strategy to drive a stake in to the heart of America.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Manic Monday #219 (On Tuesday)

Lisa’s Manic Monday #219

Fill in the blank: If I had a nickel for every time I... raided the refrigerator.

What do you think about while you exercise?
Exercise? What is that?

What are 5 things you love about your spouse/partner/significant other (or children or pet)?
Is always there when I need them
Has a good shoulder to cry on
Is a good listener
Is looking out for me

Monday, August 23, 2010

I Have Been Up North…

I got back from our cottage in New Hampshire last night; I was up there with some friends that I invite up there every year. It is nice to have company; I could go up there any time by myself and enjoy the quiet and me time. However, it is so much more enjoyable when you have friends up there with me. I like sitting around talking, I like to cook for friends and enjoy good conversation over dinner and a glass of wine.

Because of the weather, we left early, I was planning on coming home today but it was raining and we saw no sense in staying. It was raining hard all the way home, at times I was driving at 55mph on I-91 because of the heavy rain. With all the water on the road and all the spray, you couldn’t see more than a couple of hundred feet, but there were some idiots who went flying by me, hydroplaning in the water. When I got home, I just crashed out on the recliner.

Thursday night, before I left for New Hampshire, I when out to dinner with a friend and then to Real Art Ways’ Creative Cocktail Hour. We went to a nice Italian restaurant in Hartford next to Bushnell Park, called Vito’s By the Park. While we were there, my friend Stana snapped this picture of me.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Saturday Six – Episode 332

Patrick’s Place Saturday Six – Episode 332

1. Do you tend to think more or speak more?
I think more, but once I get talking, I don’t stop.

2. How often do you find yourself writing down your thoughts so that you won’t forget some good idea?
Not too much right now, but I think in the future I will have to write things down. However, I need to keep track of my appointments on a calendar.

3. What location allows you to do the best thinking?
A quite corner without distractions is best for me.

4. During which routine activity do you tend to do your best thinking?
Sleeping, I come up with my best idea in the middle of the night.

5. Take the quiz: What does your favorite Thought Bubble say about you?

Your Thoughts Are Constructive

You are a highly analytical person, and you tend to sit back and cooly assess a situation.
With you, logic and facts rule. And you never jump to conclusions.

You are always looking to think in new ways. You believe that reflecting is a good way to better yourself.
You tend to think before you talk or act. You are calmer than most people around you.

6. Go back to the test and choose your second choice: which of the two better describes you?
Your Thoughts Are Creative.
I think my original choice is the closest to describing me.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Friday Fill-ins #190

Janet’s Friday Fill-ins #190


1. Laughter _is a good stress reliever_.

2. _”I just checked the date of the voice message, July 13th... I really do check my voice mail regularly, at least once a month.”_ are the three words that started off the last email I sent. (I called an acquaintance to return a voice mail that she left me and I just listened to and didn’t realize that the message was there for over a month.)

3. What I'm most looking forward to today is _going up to the cottage with some friends_.

4. _Laughter_ puts a smile on my face.

5. Where in the world _ are my car keys_?

6. _Jumping in a lake is_ just what I needed!

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to _cookout with friends up at the cottage_, tomorrow my plans include _floating in the lake in inner tubes_ and Sunday, I want to _cool off in the lake some more_!

Thursday, August 19, 2010

My Story Part – 41 Restaurants

The story of my going to restaurants, it is a story about “coming of age”

I never was a big fan of going out to eat, especially by myself. I mostly didn’t go out to eat because of my parents, the only time that I went out to dinner with them or my family, and (like children everyone) I was embarrassed to go out to dinner with my parents. It wasn’t until I started going out as Diana that I enjoyed dinning out. However, it was a very rocky road at first.

The first time that I went out to dinner as Diana was with the Connecticut Outreach Society, to a dinner at the Gold Roc diner in West Hartford. I was very nervous and the directions that they send said to go into the diner, turn left and go all the way to the end and turn right. Well I did, head down, pocketbook tucked under my arm, I march right down there and looked up and no one was there! I sat down, not looking around, just staring at the table and when the waiter came over, he said, “I think the group that you want is over there!” I looked to where he was pointing and all my friends were sitting there giggling, I walked right past them, not seeing them. Sheepishly, I got up and walked over to them.

The next time I went out to diner, it was also with COS, this time to the Pond House in Elizabeth
Park, this time when I arrived I looked around the room and saw them sitting over in the corner. I walked over and took a seat with my back to the restaurant, so that no one could see my face and I didn’t have to see all the people staring at us. Another time at the Pond House was right after I gave my nephew a bright yellow ski jacket that I no longer wore. I walked in to the restaurant and there was a kid sitting at another table with his back towards me, wearing a ski jacket that looked just like the one that I gave away… panic! I ending up sitting with my back to them. When I came out to the family, I learned that my nephew never went to the Pond House, so as usual, I worried for nothing.

We use to have a word that we used to denote a safe place to go, “Trannitized” as in, “Oh that restaurant is safe to go to, I trannitized them last week” and it was a major concern at that time in my life about where the safe places were to go. I worried about going to a place for the first time, would they throw us out? Would they laugh at us? Over time I learned that my fears were groundless, that all places don’t really care if you are trans, they are just interested in the color of your money (that is not to say that there are not any places that discriminate, there are, but I have not found any that discriminated against me. Close, but no cigar. I had to stare down a woman at the door of a lesbian bar in Ogunquit. She finally said, well I guess it is OK for you to come in and she took my $5 cover charge)

Now I go to any restaurant that I want, I still hate to eat alone, but I always did. I like to have a good meal with good friends.

My blog entries are cross posted to Facebook

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

The Genderless Future

Newsweek has an article called “Are We Facing a Genderless Future?” by Barbara Kantrowitz and Pat Wingert this week about the genderless future, and the first person who is legally genderless. The person lives in Australia and is listed in the birth registry as nether male nor female, the article states…
This spring, an Australian named Norrie May-Welby made headlines around the world as the world’s first legally genderless person when the New South Wales Registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages sent the Sydney resident a certificate containing neither M for male or F for female.

For a few days, it appeared that the 48-year-old activist and performer had won a long legal battle to be declared “sex not specified”—the only category that felt right to this immigrant from Scotland. May-Welby’s journey of gender identity can only be characterized as a long and winding road. Registered male at birth, May-Welby began taking female hormones at 23 and had sex-change surgery to become a woman, but now doesn’t take any hormones and identifies as genderless. The prized piece of paper May-Welby sought is called a Recognised Details Certificate, and it’s given to immigrants to Australia who want to record a sex change.
The government has since rescinded the birth certificate and Norrie is appealing the decision.

The article goes on to talk about the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual) and the changes proposed for the fifth edition, changing “Gender Identity Disorder” to “Gender Incongruence” (I wrote about it here), on how the modern view of gender in not binary but a continuum or a spectrum.
But that seemingly simple change of language could help usher in a new era, in which a person’s gender could be expressed or experienced as male, female, “in between,” or “otherwise.” “People who work in this area have very flexible notions of gender,” Drescher says. “We don’t want to force people to fit into a doctor’s categories,” even though, he concedes, most cultures “tend to think in binaries.”

Bockting predicts that such binary thinking will eventually disappear. Many scientists, he says, see gender as a continuum and acknowledge that some people naturally fall in the middle. Gender, Bockting [associate professor and clinical psychologist at the University of Minnesota Medical School] says, “develops between the biological and the environmental. You can’t always detect gender by physical evidence. You have to ask the person how they identify themselves; in that sense, it’s psychological.”
Many people still think of gender as male and female, totally ignoring intersex people and about 1 in 1500 births are intersexed and that number does not take into count persons who identify as transgender which also about 1 in 2000 births.

The article goes on and talks about the history of genderless people in societies,
Even before the advent of sex-change surgery, there were always people who felt they didn’t fit into either gender. In India, a group of people called hijra have existed for centuries. They are typically biological males who dress as women but consider themselves to have neither gender, Bockting says. There is also a long tradition of eunuch culture. Even today, other countries are more comfortable with the idea of gender variance. Drescher says that France has removed transsexuality from its list of psychiatric disorders and put it in the category of rare diseases. The British government has also declared that transsexuality is “not a mental illness,” but people who want a sex-change can get treatment under the National Health Service.

So, what do we learn from this? What would you do if your child came to you and said that they felt they should be the other gender? There was an article in the Chicago Tribune by By Nara Schoenberg,
When kids cross the gender divide

Does your 4-year-old son dress up in his big sister's tiaras and princess costumes?

Does your 3-year-old daughter hate dolls?

With celebrity gossip sites buzzing over Angelina Jolie's comment that her 4-year-old daughter, Shiloh, wants to be a boy, media reports spotlighting rare cases of transgender children and even children's books beginning to tackle the issue, concerned parents are sifting through a lot of contradictory information.

"I think parents are very worried and confused and there isn't clear-cut advice," says Ellen Perrin, chief of developmental-behavioral pediatrics at the Floating Hospital for Children at Tufts Medical Center in Boston. "It's a complex issue."

Childhood gender behavior varies a lot, experts say, and there is a wide range of reasons a boy may want long hair (maybe he identifies with his favorite sports star) or a girl may refuse to wear dresses (perhaps they're just not her style).

What's more challenging for parents is when a child consistently pursues a range of behaviors strongly associated with the opposite sex. A boy might play with Barbies, wear dresses, vehemently reject sports and say that he wants to be a girl. A girl might insist on playing only with boys, get a boy's haircut and express strong discomfort with her own body parts.
Therapists differ dramatically in their approach to these children, with some taking the relatively new approach of supporting kids who want to live openly as members of the opposite sex. Others encourage kids to discard their more pronounced behaviors, explore new interests and embrace their own gender.

Many therapists take the middle ground of, say, accepting a very determined boy's desire to wear dresses and saying it's fine for him to do so at home, but strongly encouraging him to refrain from that behavior in school, where he might encounter unpleasant responses.

"I think the general trend has been to take more of a stance of tolerance toward the behavior instead of the old type of stance where they would yell at (these boys), criticize them, punish them for any sort of girlish behavior and send them off to military schools," says Gregory Lehne, an assistant professor of medical psychology at the Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine. "That didn't work particularly well."
Nor does beating them to death.
"Parents should be concerned if their children are concerned," says Ellen Perrin, chief of developmental-behavioral pediatrics at the Floating Hospital for Children at Tufts Medical Center. "If this is causing discomfort or distress in the child, they need to talk to the child and figure out what's going on.

"Some children, they're kind of miserable and those parents need to get some help. Nobody's going to change the child, but sometimes parents can be given advice that can make life easier."
As the article points out only 5 to 25 percent of the gender variant children grow up to be transgender. Your choice as parents determine what the mental health of the child will be when they grow up. Will they carry a guilt complex, feeling that what they feel is wrong or will they know love.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

On The Lighter Side

Today, the “Beloit College Mindset List for the Class of 2014” was in the news and I looking trough it made me feel so old. Here are some of the items that made me feel old…

12. Clint Eastwood is better known as a sensitive director than as Dirty Harry.
This was my top “feel old” item from the list. I remember all of those “Spaghetti” westerns that he was in and how their voices were not in-sync with their lips.

8. With increasing numbers of ramps, Braille signs, and handicapped parking spaces, the world has always been trying harder to accommodate people with disabilities.
This one is good, maybe someday in the future, students will only know of marriage equality and all trans-people are treated as equals.

10. A quarter of the class has at least one immigrant parent, and the immigration debate is not a big priority…unless it involves “real” aliens from another planet.
Another good one, maybe someday we will be welcoming to all immigrants, not just the “white skin” immigrants.

19. They never twisted the coiled handset wire aimlessly around their wrists while chatting on the phone.
This one really made me feel old.

26. Unless they found one in their grandparents’ closet, they have never seen a carousel of Kodachrome slides.
I have a whole drawer full of slides. Someday, kids will marvel on film cameras.

31. The first computer they probably touched was an Apple II; it is now in a museum.
This one really hurt, I have one in my basement and it still works!

43. Russians and Americans have always been living together in space.
Another good thing. I remember “Duck and Cover”…

55. Rock bands have always played at presidential inaugural parties.
Thank you President Clinton.

65. They first met Michelangelo when he was just a computer virus.
Not good.

Monday, August 16, 2010

Manic Monday #218

Lisa’s Manic Monday #218

What are 5 things you want to do in your life?
Graduate the spring with my MSW
Travel across the U.S. and visit all the national parks
Take a windjammer cruise up the coast of Maine
Take a train trip trough the Canadian Rockies
Make it to 100 in a sound body and mind

What are you saying goodbye to?
My old life.

What are you currently fascinated with?

I don’t know…maybe a wireless file server. I saw this 2T byte drive that you can use to back up your computers and files. I know, I’m a geek.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Maine Trip Day 3

Today I went up the coast to Boothbay to go to the Coastal Maine Botanical Garden. It was about a two-hour drive from my brother’s condo, half the drive was on the Maine Turnpike and I-295 and the rest of the way was on secondary roads (Rt. 1 & Rt. 27). The roads went winding along the Maine shore and every one in awhile the road would cross an ocean inlet or a tidal river. On the way up, it was low tide, however, on the way back, it was just about high tide with the water was swirling under the bridges as the tide rushed in. The drive took me past the Bath Iron Works where they work on Navy ships and a few of them were tied up to the docks and the cranes they have at the shipyard were gigantic.

On the drive to the gardens, there was one traffic jam that lasted for about a mile and a half in each direction. Why was it backed up? It was because of a crosswalk. One or two cars would get by before someone crossed the street and traffic came to a halt as they crossed. They really should put in a crossing light to control the pedestrian traffic, instead of just random foot traffic that only allows one or two cars to pass at a time. [End of Rant]

The gardens were beautiful! I was so glad that I went. The garden is 248 acres and it has over a mile of ocean frontage (you can see the map here), the trails just wind through out the different gardens. Here are some of the photos that I took…

They would let me go beyond this point*
But they did have a garden just for us, wasn’t that sweet of them…
*They have a fairy village for the kids (see map).

I’m Up At My Brother’s & Sister-In-Law’s Condo On Maine This Weekend

I was originally supposed to dogsit their dog Mattie, but sadly, she passed away, so now I’m just condo sitting this weekend. Yesterday I went down to Kittery to do some shopping for school, but I did stay long because it was mobbed. It was wall-to-wall people, so I just stayed long enough to make the trip to Kittery worthwhile. However, I did stop at Terra Cotta Paste to buy some lobster ravioli and Newbury sauce to take home. The ravioli was delicious, but I did like the Newberg sauce, it to too thin and wasn’t cream based.

Yesterday, I went down to the local beach for the afternoon. Because of the limited parking, I had to park about a half a mile away and carry all my stuff to the beach. When I got there at around eleven, the beach was pretty deserted, but by the time I left, there was a crowd. I just don’t understand some people, this family came and plopped down in front of me blocking my view of the water with their umbrella. There were open spots on either side of my where they could have claimed, but no, they had to sit in front of me. So, I packed up and left around two-thirty, I was planning on staying only until three anyway.

For dinner, I went to a place that I like on Cape Porpoise that sits right at the end of the town dock where the fishing boats unload (Photo: The lobster traps that were stored on the dock). While I was waiting for my dinner, I watched the fisherman loading the bait fish for their traps. They put a small fish in each trap to attract the lobster. For dinner, I had fried clams, onion rings and Cole Slaw and then walked around on the dock. Afterward, I went back to the condo and tried to stay awake until ten, but I only made it to 9:30. The sun and salt air takes a lot out of you, and even though I was sitting under an umbrella, I got a slight sunburn.

Today I am heading up to Boothbay to visit the Coastal Maine Botanical Gardens.

Look for an update once I get back.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Saturday Six – Episode 331

Patrick’s Place Saturday Six – Episode 331

1. Do you usually feel physically younger or older than you actually are?
Right now after sitting out on the beach for three hours and having a shore diner, I feel a lot older

2. When it comes to your own sensibilities and personal taste, do you usually feel younger or older than you actually are?
I have more mature tastes.

3. Do you think you were better at being a kid or an adult?

As an adult, I’m living life more than ever before.

4. Do you find yourself trying to make more time for play or rest these days?
As I said, right now all I want to do is sleep

5. Take the quiz: Are You a Puppy or a Kitten?

You Are a Kitten

You are playful and sweet, but you also treasure your alone time.
You're pretty independent, and you resent anyone trying to tell you what to do.

You don't get bored easily. You are quite good at entertaining yourself.
Deep down, you are quite sensitive and intuitive. You are less standoffish than you seem.

6. Which have you had more of in your life: dogs or cats?

Dogs, no one on our family have any cats.

Friday, August 13, 2010

Saturday 9: Superstition

Crazy Sam’s Saturday 9: Superstition

1. What are you superstitious about?
I am not superstitious.

2. What’s the story behind one of your scars?
The one over my left eyebrow is from when my brother and I were sword fighting with curtain rods and he stabbed me.

3. What are three things that you would rather be doing right now?
Napping (I’m writing this at 4:30 in the afternoon)
Eating (after I nap)
Sleeping (after I eat)

4. What do you do when you're bored?
Surf the web and do memes

5. What's your favorite thing to do? Why?
Photography, because I try to capture the beauty that I see every day.

6. What do you do when you're lonely?
Surf the web and do memes

7. How do you measure the passing of time in life?
Watching my niece, nephews and their kids grow up.

8. What would constitute "the perfectly lived day" for you?
Being with a family or a bunch of friends.

9. If you knew you were going to die in a year, what would you do in your final days?
I can't say, its X rated.

Friday’s Fill-ins #189

Janet’s Friday’s Fill-ins #189


1. Music _is something that we can't live without_.

2. _To check my email_ is what I like first thing in the morning.

3. The first thing I said this morning was: _good morning to my brother_.

4. _Fried clams_; it's what's for dinner tonight. (Cape Pier Chowder House)

5. It's all been _a hot summer_

6. _Going down to Kittery to the factory outlets for some shopping therapy _ is what I feel like doing right now.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to _going out to dinner_, tomorrow my plans include _soaking up the sun on Parson’s beach_ and Sunday, I want to _go to Coastal Maine Botanical Gardens in Camden ME_!

Thursday, August 12, 2010

My Story Part 40 - Effects Of Hormones

When I start on hormones, the doctor informed me of the risks of taking the hormones, which are an increased risk of breast cancer, of blood clots, of gallbladder disease, and of heart attack or stroke. I understood what was involved when I started hormones and accepted the increased risk.

But there were some other minor side effects of hormones that I never knew about and I think most other trans-people didn’t know about. The first effect that manifested was what it is called a “pregnancy mask” or Melasma which a darkening of the skin. I have it on my arms, it kind of scared me when I first noticed it, it kind of looks like I have patches of dirt on my arm. I showed to my sister-in-law who is a nurse and she told me it was a pregnancy mask and was later confirmed by my dermatologist. The next thing I found was what is called “skin tag” little flaps of skin. I didn’t know it might be caused by hormones until I was googling them (which lead to the post), I have a one on my neck, which might be related to the hormones.. You can find a list of some of the common side of hormones here.

One of the side effects that I did know about was weight gain. I was hit with a triple whammy, I started hormones, I was getting older and I retired. I went from being active at work all day to just sitting in the classroom for a couple of hours a day. I turned sixty and your body starts to burn less calories. Then when you start on hormones you lose muscle mass and because muscle burn calories just because they muscles, your metabolism decreased. As a result, I put on the pounds and they are very hard to take off.

I have been on hormones for going on six years, what are the long-term effects of cross-gender hormones? Well no one really knows; the use of cross-gender hormones is an off-label use of them and therefore there is no research, we are the guinea pigs.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Thoughts On The Connecticut Primaries

Everyone won in the primaries that were expected to win, there were no big upsets.

It seems to me that there were two types of ads, one promising to over turn the status quo (If you elect me I’ll straighten out Washington/Hartford), never saying just the would cut or change. The other type was the attack ads, my opponent said back in 1972 that the sun revolves around the earth and now he is saying that the earth revolves around the sun… he flip-flops, so how can he be trusted! Or the one I loved, my opponent lives in a big house! One candidate promised that he would balance the state budget by cutting back on the number of state employees, freezing their salaries and not raise taxes. I read in one blog that said if you fire all the state employees, you would still have a billion dollar deficit, so just how is he going to balance the budget.

The other thing about this election was the public campaign financing, it seemed like all the millionaires sued over the use of public funding and lost. The millionaires didn’t think it was right to use public funding, that the other candidates should have to raise their own money. Then when candidates raised campaign funds, the millionaires boasted that they didn’t take PAC money. One millionaire spent around $20,000,000 to win the primary and vowed to spent another $30 million more to buy win the senate seat.

The way I think of politics is that there are two groups… the haves and the have-nots. Whichever group is in office tries to maximize their political clout for their group. When the haves are in power, they try to keep their wealth by giving themselves tax breaks and deregulating businesses. Conversely, when the have-nots are in office they tax the rich to give to the poor and regulate business.

I see the function of government as providing a safety net and protecting its citizens and the environment. I believe in the EPA and OSHA to protect its citizens, I believe in the SEC and the regulation of derivatives to provide a safe business climate that builds trust. If you are buying a bond and it is AAA rated, it should mean something, not like it did in 2008 where AAA bonds turned out to be junk bonds. I believe in J K Galbraith’s theory of countervailing power where the purpose of government is to balance the powers between business and labor, which is something that we have lost. Business right now, I think has too much power. I also believe in Keynesian Economics theory and d that is why I am against the TARP funds that bailed out the finical institutions. It was not Keynesian Economics; instead, it was designed by the “haves” (Bush II administration) to give money to the “haves” AIG, Morgan Stanley, GM, etc.

So I guess you can say that I am rooting for the “have-nots”

Update: 9:21pm
For the senate race the Republican winner spent $351.47 per vote. ($21 million and 59,749 people voted for her.)

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

A Blast From The Past!

I was going through some old photos last week when I came across this photo of me. I think it was taken in the late fifties in the kitchen. It had to be slightly after we moved here from Devon.
The twins, I think were from up the street, but who the other girls are I have no idea. I think it wasn’t a holiday party because I think it would have been family and not the neighbors at a holiday party, so therefore it might have been my birthday.

I find it interesting that I’m sitting at a table with five girls and if it was my birthday party, then it is more intriguing. I do know that when we lived down in Devon, I use to play with the girl down the street and not with the boys in the neighborhood until I was older.

I just love the expression, I wonder what I was thinking.

Monday, August 09, 2010

Manic Monday #217

Lisa’s Manic Monday #217

Right now, what's on your mind?

Diner, quesadilla with peppers and tomatoes from my garden.

List 10 things you expect from a good friend.
I don’t know if I expect anything from a friend, I don’t base my friendship on what I get in return

What's something you've done that you wish you hadn't?
Oh, I answered something like this a couple of weeks ago. Counting my chickens before they are hatched.

Another Victory – NM Driver Licenses

Drivers license gender change easier for New Mexico’s transgender people
New Mexico Independent
By Marjorie Childress
August 9, 2010

Checking “F” or “M” for gender designation on a driver’s license isn’t something most people think much about. But for transgender individuals who feel different from their biological sex, the discrepancy between what’s listed as their gender on identifying documents and their appearance can lead to unexpected problems.

For example, a woman transitioning to a man might have a beard, leading to problems if pulled over in a traffic stop or to security questions at an airport, advocates say.

In a move that prompted cheers from the state’s growing transgender community, New Mexico acted last month to reduce the number of those types of situations.

The New Mexico Motor Vehicles Division in July established a new form to help facilitate changing a person’s gender designation on a drivers license. In doing so, the MVD clarified that gender surgery is not a requirement for a person seeking to change their gender. All that is required is the signature of a medical provider or clinician, stating their opinion that the person will not change their gender again in the foreseeable future.
This is an important victory because as the article points out when we transition might not match the gender on our driver license. Because of medical standards of care, we have live in our true gender for at least a year before we can have surgery. By requiring surgery before you can change your gender marker on your license might expose you to harassment or discrimination. Here in Connecticut we are lucky because we also can change our gender marker with a doctors letter.

Sunday, August 08, 2010

I Know, Lets Blame The Victim.

We see it all the time when a person from an oppressed community is attacked that they are re-victimized; she shouldn’t have been wearing a skirt that short, he was in the wrong neighborhood, he was flaunting that he is gay. No one deserves to be raped, beating or harassed. Nowhere do we see this more than in our schools.

Here in Connecticut, a trans-girl came out in high school and she was bullied and harassed. So what did the school do to correct the harassment? They transferred her to a school for troubled youth, there by punishing her for being the victim. What happened to the bully? He went on to bully other students in the school once she was gone and as a result, they transferred him to the school for troubled youth. There he found his old victim and started to bully her again, forcing her to quite school.

A couple of years ago the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network (GLSEN) issued a report in 2005, here are some of the highlights from the report.
The online survey, conducted between January 13 and January 31, 2005, reveals that bullying is common in America’s schools, and that some students are frequent targets for verbal and physical harassment:

* Two-thirds (65%) of teens report that they have been verbally or physically harassed or assaulted during the past year because of their perceived or actual appearance, gender, sexual orientation, gender expression, race/ethnicity, disability or religion.
* The reason most commonly cited for being harassed frequently is a student’s appearance, as four in ten (39%) teens report that students are frequently harassed for the way they look or their body size.
* The next most common reason for frequent harassment is sexual orientation. One-third (33%) of teens report that students are frequently harassed because they are or are perceived to be lesbian, gay or bisexual.

The survey finds that LGBT students are three times as likely as non-LGBT students to say that they do not feel safe at school (22% vs. 7%) and 90% of LGBT students (vs. 62% of non-LGBT teens) have been harassed or assaulted during the past year.
However, student do not have to be LGBT to be harassed, GLSEN reported that,
NEW YORK, April 9, 2009 - An 11-year-old Massachusetts boy, Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover, hanged himself Monday after enduring bullying at school, including daily taunts of being gay, despite his mother's weekly pleas to the school to address the problem. This is at least the fourth suicide of a middle-school aged child linked to bullying this year.
In another bullying case in South Hadley Massachusetts a girl committed suicide because she was being bullying because some of the other girls in her class were jealous of her. In addition, the school took no action when they became aware of the bullying. On MassLive.com they write that,
Prince's harassment was common knowledge to most students, faculty, staff and administrators, Scheibel said. The district attorney's investigation determined, however, that the school officials' actions, or lack of action, did not rise to the level of criminal conduct, she said during a press conference at her offices

Michael C. LaSala, Ph.D. in Psychology Today writes about Gay bullying in school, he writes…
Unfortunately, for some of these kids [LGBT], their peers figured out what was up. Adolescents are hawk-eyed guardians of the status quo, harshly punishing those whose behavior falls outside of society's narrow gender norms--and for some of the unlucky respondents in my study who inadvertently revealed cross-gendered behavior, the consequences were brutal.
Furthermore, research shows that such harassment can have a devastating effect on LGBT kids' mental health and suicide risk. The wounds persist well into adulthood, making LGBT people prone to depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem as the experiences of my clients and research respondents indicate.
As we have seen, it is not only LGBT children that are harassed and bullied, but also straight kids and that many of the victims turn to suicide to end their torment. The affects of low self-esteem can have life long consequences, I know first hand, I was one of those under achievers. Dr. LaSala goes on to write about some of the remedies…
Most of us who are mental health providers or educators are comfortable working with our young charge one-on-one or in the classroom--but when we start thinking about changing the systems that affect these kids' lives--well that's another story. And it's no wonder--it's a tricky task to confront school and community politics and policies in a way that is effective but hopefully doesn't endanger our jobs. However, if we really want to help gay and lesbian and also bisexual and transgender kids, we must step out of our offices and classrooms-leaving our comfort zones behind.
As a first step, an environmental assessment would be in order. Is the school a place that welcomes and accepts LGBT students? Are there any openly LGBT faculty? Does the school sponsor a LGBT support group? Is material on LGBT people incorporated into programs that educate students about diversity? During my research I noticed that kids who attended schools that had such resources reported considerably less harassment than those who went to schools that did not. How is antigay bullying and harassment between peers addressed at the institutional level? Do school professionals intervene or simply ignore it?
Here in Connecticut we have a strong GSA (Gay Straight Alliance) in a number of schools around the state. We also have an anti-bullying law that is suppose to protect our children from bullying and the town Boards of Education are suppose to issue an annual report on bullying in their towns. But you would be surprised at the number of school districts that report zero incidents of bullying in their towns, do you really think that a town has not one case of bullying in their system? We need to put some teeth in to the anti-bullying statutes.

On the federal level, we need to pass the Safe Schools Improvement Act that was just introduced in the Senate last week that is a similar bill to the House bill H.R. 2262. The bill will protect students from bullying and harassment in our nation's schools. The bill includes protections based on sexual orientation and gender identity/expression.

Saturday, August 07, 2010


My first post to this blog was April 1, 2006. Four years, 4 months and 6 days ago or 1589 days and I have written 1864 posts or an average of 1.1 post a day.

That is a lot of days and a lot of words.

The labels with the most posts are Memes, follow by "Trans Stuff" (well this is a blog about trans issues), then comes "About Me" (and it is my blog), and then comes "Politics" (I am an activist, so that does make sense).

Saturday Six – Episode 330

Patrick’s Place Saturday Six – Episode 330

1. You’re asked to bake cookies at home for a special gathering: which flavor of cookies are you most likely to choose to make?
Oatmeal & raisin cookies (does anyone has a fool proof recipes)

2. You’re asked to bring store-bought cookies for the event instead: which brand/flavor of cookies are you most likely to buy?
Pepperidge Farm Milano.

3. Are you more likely to bake or buy a variety that you personally like best, or one that you think most everyone else will like more than you do?
I would like to make them, but all of my attempts at cookie making have been a disaster.

4. A Girl Scout comes to your door with her cookie brochure, but you can only afford a single box: which flavor will you buy?
This is such and easy question… thin mints

5. Take the quiz: How Does Your Cookie Crumble?

You Are Solid

You are laid back and easygoing. You don't like to make too big of a fuss.
Like everyone else, you have your tastes and preferences... you're just more flexible than most people.

You are good at compromising, and you get along with all sorts of folks. You are a natural diplomat.
You try to make things as easy on others as possible. You know that life can be a drag, so why make it worse for someone else?

6. What’s your preferred way of eating an Oreo: all at once, or by separating the two outer wafers and eating the filling first?
There is ONLY ONE WAY to eat an Oreo and that is by separating the two outer wafers and eating the filling first. If you eat them any other way, you are a neophyte and has not learned the cultured way to eat an Oreo.

Friday, August 06, 2010

Saturday 9: Friends

Crazy Sam’s Saturday 9: Friends

1. How many of your friendships have lasted more than ten years? Which of your current friends do you feel will still be important to you ten years from now?
Well I did have six friends that I have known since high school, but they kind of faded away once I transitioned. In the last ten years I have developed new friend who like me as I am.

2. When you look at yourself in the mirror, what’s the first thing you look at?

My fat stomach.

3. Who was the most recent person on your missed call list on your cell phone? What’s your relationship with the person?
The last person whose call I missed was JM’s and we are part of an advocacy organization that help trans-people.

4. What did your last text message you received on your cell phone say?
Something to the effect of “we are meeting at Starbuck at 7” the text message was back in April for the group paper that we were writing.

5. How would you “label” yourself?

6. What was your favorite age that you’ve been?
Right now, they are the best years of my life.

7. What is your current desk top picture? What’s it significant?
I’m retired so I don’t have a desk, but on my mantle is a picture of my parents.

8. What was the last thing you said to someone that you‘d like to take back?
I don’t know if there is anything that I said that I want to take back.

9. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to go back in time and fix all your mistakes which would you choose?
I’ll take the million because there is nothing that I would really like to fix. My past is and always will be a part of me.

Friday Fill-ins #188

Janet’s Friday Fill-ins #188


1. Life is _new adventure each day_.

2. _When life throws you a curve you_ keep going.

3. My last text message (or IM) ended in these three words: _I have no idea, I don’t text or IM, I think it might have been back in April when a classmate sent me a text_.

4. _Clam Chowder_ is what I'm thinking about for dinner sometime soon.

5. On the 1st day of August _summer is half over_

6. _I wish I was_ lively and energetic.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to _going to the coffee shop_, tomorrow my plans include _reading_ and Sunday, I want to _visit a friend_!

Thursday, August 05, 2010

My Story Part 39 – Dreams

At Outreaches (speaking to groups), I am asked questions about my childhood and growing up and if there was anything that “made me” the way I am. Those questions bother me because it indicates they don’t really understand the nature of why people are transgender or gay, lesbian or bisexuals; we are born with our gender identity or our sexual orientation.

I grew up in a “typical” family of the fifties and sixties, two parent (male & female), two kids and a dog. My father was your “typical” 9 to 5 father who worked, came home and took an active part in his family; he was active in my brother sports and scouting with my brother and me. My mother was a stay-at-home mother, which was “typical” for the 50’s and 60’s. We took family vacations together, traveling around the east coast or staying at a lake cottage during the summer.

My brother was in to sports, while I hated sports and loved science. I guess you could have called me a “nerd” or “geek” in today language, I was a member of the science club and we made a giant Tesla Coil, it was so large that we were in an article in the New York Times. I hung out with a clique at the local McDonald’s (it was the only one, I believe in the whole state back in the sixties and early seventies… imagine that. They just sold 1 million burgers!) who were into cars, they all had these big muscle cars, GTO’s, Camaro 350 SS, Chevy II Nova, Road Runner and I had a little Opel Rally Kadett per order of my parents. I never was that interested in cars, but that was the “manly” thing to do and I knew all the keywords, dual Hollies 450, tunnel ram, bored and ported, etc., I was always hovering on the outside of the circle. However, that is where the “typical” ended, I do not think that a “typical” thought when he saw a girl in a dress, “That’s a cute dress; I wonder where she got it?’ or wishing when they were on a date that they were the girl. Or dreaming that they were one of the cheerleaders, instead of the star quarterback.

One of my earliest dreams when I was probably 10 or 11 was to have my brain swapped by an evil scientist and waking up to find myself in a girl’s body. Everyone would be horrified or wouldn’t believe me, but would secretly want it. You have to remember that one, I was preteen, two, that no one even knew about gender reassignment surgery at that time and three, and no one really knew anything about transsexual at that time. Yes, Christine Jorgensen happened around that time, but it wouldn’t be carried in the papers or magazines that my parents read.

So, it is hard for me to say that I know what a man thinks because I never really was a “man”. On the out side, I may have looked like and act like a man, but on the inside I didn’t feel like a man. Conversely, it is hard for me to say now that I am a woman because I don’t think that I think anything like a woman thinks. That is why I label myself as a “trans-woman”.

Wednesday, August 04, 2010

Breaking News - Federal Judge Stikes Down Prop. 8

Judge strikes down Prop. 8, allows gay marriage in California
Los Angeles Times
By Maura Dolan

A federal judge in San Francisco decided today that gays and lesbians have a constitutional right to marry, striking down Proposition 8, the voter approved ballot measure that banned same-sex unions.

U.S. District Chief Judge Vaughn R. Walker said Proposition 8, passed by voters in November 2008, violated the federal constitutional rights of gays and lesbians to marry the partners of their choice. His ruling is expected to be appealed to the U.S. 9th Circuit Court of Appeals and then up to the U.S. Supreme Court.

[Updated at 1:54 p.m.: "Plaintiffs challenge Proposition 8 under the Due Process and Equal Protection Clauses of the Fourteenth Amendment," the judge wrote. "Each challenge is independently meritorious, as Proposition 8 both unconstitutionally burdens the exercise of the fundamental right to marry and creates an irrational classification on the basis of sexual orientation."

Update: 10:00PM

Yesterday, The Good. Today, The Bad

Yesterday I wrote about the good things that are happening to gender variant children; today I have sad news to report. On Long Island NY, a boyfriend beats his girlfriend’s son to death to make him more manly.
Cops: Babysitter Struck, Killed Infant
By Stephanie Barish
August 2, 2010

RIVERSIDE, N.Y. (WPIX) - A man is accused of fatally striking a 17-month-old infant he was babysitting Sunday night on the Shinnecock Indian Reservation on Long Island, according to New York State police.

The suspect has been identified as Pedro Jones, 20, of South Hampton. He has been charged with first-degree manslaughter after allegedly hitting the boy "several times throughout his body with close fists" and grabbed him by the neck, according to the felony complaint filed by police.

Authorities say Jones also told them, "I was trying to make him act like a boy instead of a little girl. I never struck that kid that hard before."

The infant, Roy A. Jones, was reportedly found in cardiac arrest and was rushed to Southampton Hospital where he died around 8:30 p.m.

This is more common than you think. I wrote about children being beating before…
Police: Man Beat Boy For Putting Pink Fingernail Polish On Nails

A man was arrested on child abuse charges after he beat a 7-year-old boy with a belt because the child put pink fingernail polish on his own nails, according to Orange County sheriff's deputies.
Society is so hung up on Machoism that some men will beat their own child to death then have a gay or effeminate son or end up on the street because they are thrown out of the house.

On the Streets
The Federal Response to Gay and Transgender Homeless Youth
Center for American Progress
By Nico Sifra Quintana, Josh Rosenthal, Jeff Krehely
June 21, 2010

Every child deserves a supportive and loving home. But for many lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender children and youth, that home is not available.* Gay and transgender youth are disproportionately represented among homeless youth in our country, experiencing extreme rates of violence, discrimination, and poor health while homeless.

This is happening at least partly because gay and transgender people are coming out at younger ages as society becomes increasingly supportive of equality. Twenty years ago, most people started coming out in their 20s, well after most had left home and started working. If someone’s family rejected them for being gay or transgender, it may have been emotionally painful, but the person could still likely take care of himself or herself.

Today, the usual coming out age is in the mid-teen years, when youth still depend on their families to meet their material needs and are particularly vulnerable if their family outright rejects them. For gay and transgender youth in these situations, family rejection can lead to a chain reaction of events that sends them cascading through social safety nets that are not equipped to support them.
It is time to end the hate and violence. It is time to call out those who preach hate.