How many times have we heard, “Oh you are so brave?”
Are we brave because we chose to live over dying?
Are we brave because we chose to live without lies than to living a life of lies?
I am always amazed when someone tells me that I am so brave because I don’t feel brave. At an awards dinner last Thursday night a number of people came up to me and told me that I am so brave. One person told me that I’m the bravest person that they know. I never contemplated suicide but many other have thought about and many have committed suicide. For me, I just saw myself spiraling down into depression and that was a path I did not want to take. So is it brave to do something that improves your quality of life?
I went through a dark period of my life where many times I cried myself to sleep when I saw the two roads that my life could take and I chose the easier path, to transition. Yes, I knew it was going to be hard to go against society’s norms but it looked a lot better than a dark pit with no bottom. Life doesn’t offer any easy ways, we all have our crosses to bear.
Life is hard as a trans-person but does that make you brave? But when is life easy? We all have our speed bumps in life, mine just happens to be bigger. I know some who are fighting cancer, I know some who are fighting mental illness, I know some who have lost a loved one, and some fighting all of those at the same time does that make them brave?
To me someone is brave is when they rush out to save a fallen comrade, to me someone is brave when they rush into a burning building to save someone, to me someone is brave when they put their life on the line to save another person.
Choosing life, is not brave, it is being human. I know a lot of people who chose to be human and choose life over death.
Are we brave because we chose to live over dying?
Are we brave because we chose to live without lies than to living a life of lies?
I am always amazed when someone tells me that I am so brave because I don’t feel brave. At an awards dinner last Thursday night a number of people came up to me and told me that I am so brave. One person told me that I’m the bravest person that they know. I never contemplated suicide but many other have thought about and many have committed suicide. For me, I just saw myself spiraling down into depression and that was a path I did not want to take. So is it brave to do something that improves your quality of life?
I went through a dark period of my life where many times I cried myself to sleep when I saw the two roads that my life could take and I chose the easier path, to transition. Yes, I knew it was going to be hard to go against society’s norms but it looked a lot better than a dark pit with no bottom. Life doesn’t offer any easy ways, we all have our crosses to bear.
Life is hard as a trans-person but does that make you brave? But when is life easy? We all have our speed bumps in life, mine just happens to be bigger. I know some who are fighting cancer, I know some who are fighting mental illness, I know some who have lost a loved one, and some fighting all of those at the same time does that make them brave?
To me someone is brave is when they rush out to save a fallen comrade, to me someone is brave when they rush into a burning building to save someone, to me someone is brave when they put their life on the line to save another person.
Choosing life, is not brave, it is being human. I know a lot of people who chose to be human and choose life over death.
Of course you chose to live your life of lies until you were conveniently able to retire quite late in life. You chose transition after you had the ability to retire and had made a really good living as a man. Typical of most late transitioners.
ReplyDeleteThat sounds more like a coward to me and I find it humorous that it is all you very late transitioners that try and sell this very same line of bullshit in your blogs. When will you learn only the dumb and dumber believe it?
I was always taken aback by that too Diana. Until it dawned on me that bravery is the same thing as courage. Contrary to popular belief courageous people are not people free of fear but are people who move forward in spite of their fear. The person who runs into that burning building to save another is pushing past their fear of death and injury. If they had no fear they would be foolish not brave. Only those facing overwhelming fear are ever able to show courage, no fear, no courage.
ReplyDeleteWhen I think of bravery as the overcoming of fear it becomes clear to me that we trans folks are brave, because we experience fear that for many would be unbearable. We face the fear of losing everyone we love, of losing our livelihood, our homes, virtually everything we hold dear yet we move forward anyway, that is courage. That is bravery.
Today, when that is said about me, or any of my trans brothers and sisters, I accept the compliment gracefully knowing full well that the reason I am brave is because I conquered the worst fear any person can imagine, the fear of being totally and forever alone.