You’re Better Than Your Brother

That was what a trans woman that I know was told when she gave a presentation at a conference. She is well known in her field and has given workshop as a male before but this was the first time she gave one as a woman and they thought she was better than her "brother." I have heard similar comments from other professional trans people and one of their concerns is maintaining their professional identity.

What to Do When Your Colleague Comes Out as Transgender
Harvard Business Review
By Dorie Clark
FEBRUARY 5, 2015

By now, many professionals have openly gay colleagues at work, including the 66,000 U.S. employees of Apple, whose CEO, Tim Cook, famously became the first Fortune 500 CEO to come out last October. But far fewer people have had the experience of working with an openly transgender colleague (i.e., someone “whose gender identity or expression is different from those typically associated with the sex assigned to them at birth,” according to advocacy group the Human Rights Campaign).

So what are some of their suggestions for when a colleague transitions?

• Unless you’re already good friends, keep your reactions to a minimum. Someone who comes out to you as transgender certainly hopes for a positive response – but also doesn’t want coming out to be a huge deal.
• Take your cues from your colleague. Some of your transgender colleagues may be pleased to discuss their own experiences or trans issues in general, while others may be more reticent.
• Be mindful of the pronouns. No one is going to expect you to become an instant expert on transgender issues.
• Relax about the bathroom. Bathrooms were a source of great sturm und drang during the debate about gays in the military, and they may be so even more when it comes to transgender issues.
• Do research on your own. You may be tempted to pepper your colleague with questions about transgender issues, and on one hand, that’s a laudable impulse.

I think these are some good tips for employees when a co-worker comes out as trans. For many of us we just want to concentrate on the job ad we don’t want to be the center of focus. Just treat me as just another employee.

Update: My touch of OCD noticed that the hit counter is at 191903, only 16 more hits for 191919, I have to see if I can catch it then.