1. A friend borrows your favorite DVD and keeps forgetting to return it: are you more likely to keep needling him about it or just quietly replace it and remember never to loan him another one?
I don’t think that I have any time limit, I just won’t lend them any more DVD until they return the first DVD.
2. A friend borrows $50 and forgets to pay back the loan. How long are you likely to wait for the money before you assume that you’ll never see it?
I don’t know, it depends upon the person, since I very rarely lend money out, so I don’t know the answers. However, I will tell you a story…
Once back, when I had just gotten out of college, a friend needed $1500 to repair the windshield and some other defects on his car. He needed his car to go to work but he couldn’t register it until the car was fixed, so I loaned him the money. However, I wrote a simple contract up on literally the back of two envelop. It simple said that I was giving him the money to fix his car and he agreed to pay my back $50 a week. Every week when he gave me the $50 we both signed both of the envelops with the amount paid. After several months, he stopped paying. I was at a local bar with some friends when he came in with his wife, somehow the topic of money came up and I asked him why he stopped paying. His wife chimed in and said that it was a gift and he is not going to give me anything more money. That I lied when I gave him the money because I said it was a gift. I pulled out my copy of the agreement and said no, he still has to pay off $750. That was last time I saw them, but every week I got a $50 bill in the mail until the loan was paid off. It turned out that the next week they filed for divorce and he moved to Texas and worked on oil wells. Every once in awhile, I here from him and he is still in Texas.
3. Of the scenarios presented in the first two questions, which one is likely to do more damage to the friendship, or will either do more than the other?
Both, since friendship is based on trust.
4. If you receive what you believe is a sincere apology from someone, how likely are you to completely drop any anger you had over what caused the apology to begin with?
Well first of all, I don’t get angry, I get disappointed. But yes, an apology is a good start.
5. Take the quiz: Do You Hold a Grudge?
You Don't Hold a Grudge |
 You're willing to give almost anyone a second chance, even if they've really wronged you. Incredibly forgiving and compassionate, you understand that people sometimes change for the better. |
6. Think of the people you’re no longer friends with: generally speaking, who’s more at fault for the end of the friendships: you, them, or an equal mix?
It is a mix, I tend to lose contact with them. The relationships just fade away.
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