Friday, February 16, 2018

Do We Ever Forget The Past?


I am a women!

We all have heard trans people say that they are a woman or a man after they have transitioned or had surgery but can we ever forget our past history?

I transitioned over 10 years ago when I think or dream I am just “I” I am genderless in my dreams, in my memories. When I think of the time long,long ago when my father and my brother used to go out on Lake Winnisquam (A smaller lake off of Lake Winnipesaukee) at night and come back with a bucket  loaded with bullheads, I am just me. I am not a little boy or girl in my memory but just me.

But when I think of when I was a scout I know I was a boy scout, I know that I was never in the girl scouts.

I know many trans people who do not want any pictures that remind them of their past, many tear up or burn all their old pictures… do does that really do away with our past?

When we destroy our past are we destroying ourselves? When we burn all our old photos and anything that reminds us of our past are we erasing a part of ourselves? Are we performing Electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) therapy on ourselves to burn out the past? 

I transitioned when I was 59 so I have a lot of history.

At one of my birthday parties
What about someone who transitioned when they were five? Will they ever forget that they are trans?

I know many trans people who transitioned at an early age; when they are 59 will they still remember that they are trans?

When I get comments on my blog saying that “I am a woman because I had surgery and you didn’t so you are just “a man in a dress.” my thoughts are… well if you are a woman why does it bother you so much that I am an out trans woman? You must still be remembering your past. Why are you still visiting trans blogs?


I read a news article about a trans woman down under in Australia and she described herself as a “Woman with a unique history.” I like that definition, it doesn’t destroy our past but acknowledges it

1 comment:

  1. Having changed my body to match my essence when I was 22, (almost 50 years ago), I have little memory of what life was like prior to that time.
    I visit blogs like yours to provide all alternative narrative and to perhaps offer some hope and guidance to your younger readers who might have an opportunity to live their dreams as I have.

    ReplyDelete