Create A Connection

Getting to Know You: Soul searching: Horizons & boundaries

1) Do you think you really know yourself pretty well?
I think I know myself as well as a person can know herself.

1a) Tell us more.
Well I think that we can fool ourselves. I think we can talk ourselves into believing that what we are doing is what we really want to do. And there in lies the dilemma, how do we really know ourselves?

2) Do you think you are a tolerant person?
Yes.

2a) How far?
I believe a person should have a wide range of freedoms as long a it does not affect another persons safety or rights.

3) What about your strong opinions?
I try not to force my opinions on others, I try not to voice my opinion when there is a danger of tempers going too far.

3a) Is it easy to talk about them or can it hurt others opinion?
I am willing to discuss my opinions when I see that I can maybe change their opinions, but I will not argue.

3b) Can it create distance between you and your family?
It has a very strong possibility, but it can also bring family members closer together. I got into a heated discussion with my brother over the Boy Scouts, I respect their right as a private organization to discriminate, but I feel that they are bigots. I feel that way because they discriminate against gays, atheists and agnostics.
My brother argued that that was out weighted by the good that they do and I said that that does not justify bigotry.
He said, “Well they know not to try and join.” and I replied, “Unless you dreamed all your life of being a scout and you are turned away because of who you are.”
My brother that said something like, “Big deal” and I replied “Unless you are the one being turned away… do you know what it is like to be discriminated against? Well I do!” ( by this time I was in tears.)
He stopped talking looked at me and walked away.
He later came to me and apologized and said I was making him examine his beliefs, and then he hugged me.

3c) You and your friends?
I weight my friendships on their beliefs; I will not make friends or stay friends with people whose beliefs are at odds with mine.

4)What is judgmental?
Forming an opinion about a person before you get to know them.

4a) Do you judge yourself, do you give limits to yourself, as you are like this so you can not do that?
Of course, doesn’t everyone judge themselves? I will not judge others. How does that saying go, something about wearing their shoes.

4b) Do you have this feeling that people who sort of know you sometimes can limit you, because you feel you are what they see and know of you and you can't be more wondering/worrying if they will still love you the same and accept you if you think or act this way?
See my answer to 3c.

5) How do you push your limits and open your self to new horizons?
By doing things that for some reason you do not like. For me it’s calling on the phone, I much rather see them in person or email them.

5a) What did you learn or discovery lately about yourself that surprised you?
I think I surprise myself every day. I think learning that I like doing “Outreach” (Speaking to college classes or groups about transgender issues.).

6) Have you ever done something that was very unusual for you?
I never thought I would be sitting up on stage in front of over two hundred people.

6a) Do you sometimes research and try new things to get closer to your real self, to grow, to go on building your personality, to always develop it and evolve?
Going back to college for my Master degree.

7) What are the limits you won't ever cross? I mean in changing, evolving, saying who you are, being your true self?
Changing one’s gender in order to be your true self is pretty hard to beat.

7a) What are the limits you keep, to have a full balance being you, sharing your truths and being accepted?
I will not be pressured into going farther in my transition than I am comfortable in going.