Are We Women?

I try everyday at work to walk during our morning and afternoon breaks and while I walk I think on many things. This week I was thinking about labels, how do I see myself. And then at the support group meeting this Saturday the question came up, “Are we women?
That question is a heated continuous discussion in the Trans-community, after surgery are we a woman? There are some who strongly maintain that we are, without an internal exam there is no way to tell, all our records are changed to reflex our new gender (birth certificate, drivers license, Social Security, passport, etc.). That is a very hard question to answer; the law in Connecticut says yes but many non-transperson say no.
For me, I know I never really was a man. I remember in high school when the other boys use to say; “Wow, she’s hot! Wouldn’t you like to get in her pants!” and I use to think; “Yeah, those slacks are nice. I wonder where she got them?” Not exactly what your average teenage boy thinks. I never was into sports or cars; I guess I was what you would call today a nerd. I was a square peg in a round hole.
As a woman when I am with other women and when they are talking about scouts, they are talking about Girl Scouts and I am think Boy Scouts. I remember one time a former support member came back to one of the meetings and she was crying, she didn’t know what to do. It seems that she was living deep stealth (hiding your background), she was married with an adoptive child and they were buying a house. Well the credit check came up with her male name and her husband didn’t know she was trans. She was petrified. No matter what we do or what say, we cannot escape our past
We don’t have a common background. All the surgery in the world will not make you a “woman” (Heresy! She speaks heresy. She betrays the trans-community).
So how do I define myself? After those walks this week I decided that I am a Transwoman. I think that is how it is best to describe myself; yes, I am a transsexual but that is a disorder. I am a woman with a different set of memories and with a different set of life experiences. I am a transwoman.