Coming out: in the LGBT community, it means disclosing to others the fact that you are either lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender. Most non-LGBT people think it is a one-time process, but it is not, it is an on-going process. Each time I start a new class at school, I come out. Each time I call my credit card company, I come out. When I went to have my car repaired after my accident, I came out to the auto repair shop manager.
A lesbian, gay or bisexual cannot be read as lesbian, gay or bisexual just by talking to them or seeing them, but many trans-people are identified as trans by their voice and/or appearance. When I have to call the credit card company, I always get transfer to security because I do not sound like Diana. The manger of the auto repair shop took awhile, but I could see the moment when he realized that I was trans.
We have to “Out” ourselves because of legal or tax purposes. When I transitioned I had to contact all of my credit cards companies, all of the utilities companies and finical institutions to change my names, I has to change the names on my property deeds (I still not have done that in New Hampshire because I have to re-file the deed, I need to have a lawyer. In Connecticut, I only had to give them a copy of the Probate Court order and pay $40). I still get some stock dividend checks in my male name because those companies want me to sell my stock and rebuy them. Which means that I have to pay capital gains on the transfer (if there are any tax lawyers reading this, I had mixed information about if I have to take capital gains on the transaction).
For those of us who pass easily, they still have to “out” themselves. If they go to an emergency room, you have to tell the doctors. When I told my health insurance company about my name change, they called me back to tell me that my policy dies not cover anything trans related. If you are going for a new job, many applications ask the question, “Have you ever been know by another name in the last five years?” Bingo! We have to say yes to the question and out ourselves. A trans-woman was fired from a job because she said no on the job application.
For trans-people it is a never-ending coming out process, whether it is because you are read as being trans or institutional policies or legal or medical reasons, we are in a never ending coming out process.
It never dawned on me that you would have to keep outing yourself. Another powerful post.
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