Today October 11th is the National Coming Out Day.
When we come out it affects not only us, but all of those who love and know us. When we are in the closet we are living a lie and many of us are in denial, that this is a passing phase or that I can change, all I really need is love and I can be straight. We cannot face the fact that we are trans, gay or lesbian. We are under a lot of pressure to conform; society exerts a huge amount of force to be “Normal”. The stigma attached to being different is unbearable for some people and they would do anything just to be “Normal”.
Last night, I was waiting with the other students from my class for the class before us to get out. The janitors were going around collecting the waste paper and were standing in front of me laughing and talking in a foreign language while looking at me. After they left one of the students said innocently, “I wonder what they found so funny?” She didn’t have a clue why they were laugh and I felt like saying, “Three guesses and the first two don’t count.”
That is an example when I say that the social pressure to conform is so great, society lets you know in not so subtle ways that you are different and don’t belong. For those who do come out, it take a tremendous amount of courage and bravery to stand up to that type of pressure because it will change your life forever. You cannot say afterward, “I was only kidding.” If you are thinking of coming out today, keep this in mind and ask yourself is it really necessary to come out, is there a really a need to come out?
For me it was literally a matter of life or death. I was slowly killing myself by hiding from the truth. I had medical problems that were being cause by stress and the only way I could see to relieve that stress was by being true to myself. A friend once commented when coming out to her, I showed her pictures of me as Diana and her comment was “You are smiling!” Isn't it hard? Yes, it is very hard and probably that hardest thing I have ever done. Isn’t it still stressful? Yes, but that picture of me smiling says it all.
I think it’s a great relief to be able to come out. The burden is like the world being lifted off of your shoulders. Then again, you are giving up one burden to take on several others, but for me it is worth the price. However, I’m aware that I have more of a choice of whether or not to come out than many transgender people do. I applaud your bravery in living the life that you want for yourself! I’m so glad you can finally smile.
ReplyDeleteDiana - HAPPY NATIONAL COMING OUT DAY!
ReplyDeleteHere's a great contribution from two lesbian women to commemorate the National Coming Out Day :
Coming Out in an Evangelical Church - Wow!
You can also go directly to FaithoftheAbomination.com. Their story will be told in a documentary film. I feel this will be groundbreaking for the GLBT community.