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Faith & Hopes...Getting to know you day


1) Tell me about Faith, your different kind of faith? What it means to you?
I was born and raised as a Catholic and that gave me my sense of faith. But as I grew older I came to not believe in organized religion, each church professed to be the “True” religion. Over time I came to believe it is not where you worship but how you act to one another that was the essences of all the religions in the world.

2) Are you rather religious or mystic/spiritual? What does it bring to your life?
I consider myself religious and it bring character to me. as they say on Star Trek; it is my “Prime Directive” to treat everyone equally and fairly.

3) Do you trust and have faith in your self or do you have this tendency to abandon your self, to procrastinate and give up because of this lack of faith maybe?
Yes, I have faith in myself. However, I do not believe that procrastination is a symptom of lack of faith but rather it is avoidance to do something that you do not like.

4) Do you believe in parallell realities? How would you see them? How do they show for you?
Nope.

5) Do you believe in Past, do you sometimes feel echoes of these life?
Nope.

6) Do you believe in things that can not be proved?
Yes. Since we are talking about faith I do not believe about say, gravity. I believe in God and the reason I believe in Him is just by asking yourself the question where did all this come from? I climb a mountain and look out over the valleys or look up into the stars at night and I ask myself hw did this beauty come about.
Oh, I know about the Big Bang Theory and I believe in it, but what came before the Big Bang? No one has answer for that.

7) Love is about Faith and Hopes, tell us why you are with the person you are at the moment, what are your hopes with them for tomorrow, projects etc and how do you express and show your faith in them?
I have Hope that some day I will find someone who can look beyond that I am a transsexual and see the person inside.

8) Tell me about a time you have lost hopes? How did you react?
I haven’t, there is always hope.

9) What do you do when you see another one losing hopes and faith in them in life and everything, friends or complete stranger? How do you deal with that?
I am there for them, to listen, to help them in anyway I can.

10) If Hopes was a metaphor or poem what would it be according to you?
Here is a poem that I wrote...

* * * * *
Climbing the Mountain

I walk across the plateau to the face of the cliff,
Looking up I think that I’ll never make it.
It looks insurmountable, a formable wall in my journey.
I see others look up at the wall, shake their heads and walk away.
Deep inside me that inner voices calls.
I know that I have climbed others and have always made it,
But this looks different,
I know that I will have to summon my courage.
The plateau is comfortable, but my inner voice calls me.
I reach out and find a handhold, then another.
Slowly I pull myself up.
One handhold and one toehold after another.
Looking back from where I came, I can see the hills and valleys.
They all seemed like they were mountains and canyons then.
Now from this vantage point, I laugh at them.
Up I climb, always knowing that I may fall before I reach the top.
There will be no sage or wise man at the top,
Only the wisdom gained along the way.
I realize I have come a long ways but I still have far to go.
That inner voice calls me.
One handhold and one toehold after another I climb.
I know that at the top I will find another cliff,
And another mountain to climb after that.

Out of the Mouths of Babes….

These were sent to me by my brother, enjoy!

NOW THIS IS INFORMATION WORTH KNOWING!!!!!!!!!!

A little known fact: A 2006 study by Texas A&M University found that the average American walks about 900 miles per year.

Another study by the American Wine Institute found that Americans drink an average of 22 gallons of wine a year.

This means, on average, Americans get approximately 41 miles per gallon.

Not bad

Manic Monday

Manic Monday for August 27, 2007


What kinds of scenes in movies make you cry?
Love scenes and sad scenes like in Love Story when she is told that she has a fatal disease.

If you met your clone-- someone with your exact personality traits, likes and dislikes, etc. -- would you want to be friends with him/her? Why or why not?
Like the movie “Twins” I would probably befriend her. We would hopefully have a lot in common.

What is your biggest challenge in life right now?
My biggest challenge is getting through this fall semester, it looks like there is going to be a lot of reading and a lot of writing.
My Micro Theory class, according to the syllabus for the class there are two papers that I have to write. One paper on Parenting – now what do I know about parenting and kids? The other paper is on Behavioral analysis, we have to do a five week study on someone’s bad habits and come up with way to change them.
My other class is Research where we will have to analyze research papers and conduct a survey. So be forewarned that you will be seeing class surveys that I have to write. So please help a struggling student and fill out the survey.

I Was Up At the Cottage This Past Weekend

And it was HOT and HUMID, the air just about hung there, but there was a really great way to cool off….

Wrong Number at 2:40am

I got woken up this morning by a wrong number and I tossed and turned all night trying to get back to sleep. Then a little after seven I was woken up again by the roar of a propane burner, the unmistakable sound of a hot air balloon.
This time I brought my spare battery.

Follow Up To “Air Force Woman Could Be Convicted in Her Own Rape”

I have done a little more research into the article on Feminist.org and have taken some excerpts from the articles that I found on the incident. The links are to the complete article that I took the excerpts from.

Sexually assaulted airman is the one facing charges

11:39 PM CDT on Wednesday, August 1, 2007

By Jeff McShan / 11 New

Sexual assaults in the military are on the rise said Christine Hansen, the Executive Director of the Miles Foundation, a non-profit group that helps rape victims.

“The prevalence of sexual assaults in the military is quite extensive at this point in time,” said Hansen. “In fact there has been an increase of assaults in the military in some cases increases of 25-to-40-percent from one year to another year.”

From Congress.org web-site and open letter to Representative Stark

To:
Rep. Fortney Stark

August 8, 2007

Dear Representative Stark,

I'm writing to ask for help in the case of Cassandra Hernandez, a member of the Air Force and recent rape victim. She was raped by three other Air Force airmen at a party earlier this year. She reported the assault and went to the hospital, but after continual badgering and harassment by her superiors and peers, she decided not to testify in court.

From the “Military Times” forum….

Factual inconsistencies and the accuser’s unwillingness to testify caused Pope Air Force Base to dismiss charges in her rape case, base officials said in a statement.

The officials would not say whether the inconsistencies alone would have led to a dismissal of charges against one of the three airmen whom the woman accused of raping her in a dorm room in May 2006.

“If the victim decides not to cooperate with the prosecution and declines to testify, prosecution is extremely difficult and generally not feasible,” the officials said in the statement, released Thursday.

From the Navy Times

Woman who alleged rape faces court-martial

By Erik Holmes - Staff writer
Posted : Tuesday Aug 14, 2007 5:47:23 EDT

There was beer. There were many shots of liquor. And there was sex.

But that’s about all the four young airmen from Pope Air Force Base, N.C., can agree on.

Airman 1st Class Cassandra Hernandez, 20, said she got drunk at a party the night of May 12, 2006, and she admits that her memories of the evening are fuzzy at best. Airman 1st Class Jerrel Apache, Airman Russell Basile and Airman Rotez Butler also admit they had been drinking for several hours.

But fuzzy memories alone can’t explain the discrepancies between what they say and what she says happened after the party, in the early-morning hours of May 13, 2006.

Hernandez told investigators that the men gang-raped her in a dorm room. The men say Hernandez consented to have sex with each of them, and that she instigated the sex.

So what is the true story I do not know but I do know that it is very wrong for the Air Force to court martial her. That sends a chilling message to any other woman in the military who has been raped.

Air Force Woman Could Be Convicted in Her Own Rape

I found this on Helen Boyd bog (en)Gender and felt it worth passing it along….

Feminist Daily News Wire
August 10, 2007

Air Force Woman Could Be Convicted in Her Own Rape

A woman airman in the US Air Force who was allegedly raped by three of her male counterparts is being charged with indecent acts, according to an AP report. If convicted, the woman could face a year in prison, a pay cut, a bad-conduct discharge, and would even be registered as a sex offender, the woman's defense lawyers told the AP.

You can read the rest of the story here.

what if this is as good as it gets?

what if this is as good as it gets?: Grown-up questions...

1. Do you have a college degree?
Yes

2. What was the amount of your last electric bill?
$114.55

3. Do you have life insurance?
No, I will be dead so why have insurance.

4. How many hours per week do you work?
-0-

5. Have you ever attended a Toastmasters event?
Nope

6. Favorite place to attend Happy Hour??
I don’t go to happy hours any more.

7. How many miles is your commute to work each day (one way)?
When I worked it was 4 miles

8. What time do you get up every morning for work?
Work? What is that? When I did work it was 5:45

9. What is your definition of sleeping in late?
Seven or eight

10. Do you check your cholesterol on a yearly basis?
Every six months

11. How large was your first cell phone bill?
Around $15

12. Does your employer provide good health insurance?
It is average to fair

13. Did you use the internet to write a research paper?
Yes

14. Have you attended a High School reunion?
Yes and this year is my fortieth reunion

15. How many jobs have you held in your professional career?
I have had three jobs since college, one lasting twenty-eight years

16. Have you ever been fired or laid off from a job?
Yes, in June I got laid off. I will be retiring once the severance runs out.

17. What is your favorite drink?
Water or tea

18. What is the most expensive bottle of wine that you have in your refrigerator?
Around twelve dollars

19. Have you been divorced?
No

20. How old were you when you stopped getting ID-ed for Alcohol?
I did get carded until I was about twenty-five and they just had lowered the drinking age to eighteen.
Well actually I got carded about a year ago, but I don’t think it had anything to do with age.

21. Favorite casino?
Mohegan Sun which is about 45 minutes away.

22. Are you happier now than you were in high school?
Yes

23. Did you ever have Hypercolor shirts?
If you mean a tie died shirt yes.

24. Do you remember when Michael Jackson was black and was attracted to older people?
Yes

25. Do you remember when MTV actually played music videos?
Yes, b ut I never watched it.

26. Have you had a will made?
Yes

27. What music was in your cd / cassette player when you were 16?
Do you mean in the eight track? The Beatles

28. Favorite fancy / upscale restaurant?
Tuscany’s

29. How long has it been since you attended a kegger?
Last year, my cousin and his family are “big” beer drinkers.

30. Where were you when you found out about 9-11?
I was at work on morning break.

Manic Monday

Manic Monday for August 20, 2007

What is the biggest transition you've had to make in your life?
I will not state the obvious because I wrote about it many times elsewhere here on my blog, but I am going through another transition; being retired. In some ways it is the harder of the two. At work you knew what you had to do and there is also the social aspect of work, meeting and interacting with people.
Now after over thirty years there is no one tell you what to do, no deadline and that takes a lot of getting use to.

If you had to be famous for something, what would you choose?
A civil rights leader, I would like to be known for bring about change and making people lives better.

What surprises you most about your life so far?
That I made it this far.
On a serious note, the love of my family in helping me get through life.

Discrimination is Still with Us

A friend who is going to college to get her degree Masters in Psychology is have a hard time with a progressive liberal arts college located in rural Vermont. Last spring she went to her first semester there and got all “A” and not only that but her term paper that she wrote was passed along to the APA Division 44 Task Force (The group on GLB diversity, there is no “T” and that was what her paper was about, adding the “T” to the GLB). She is now going back to the college but the college will not give her her class assignments even though she has paid her tuition.
You see she is not transgendered but she has MS and the college does not want her to come back to college. They are trying every thing they can think up to keep her out including asking her doctor to fill out a seven page questionnaire about her health which is a violation of ADA and HIPPA laws.
I first met her by email, she said that she was a student going to a local college for her bachelor and she was majoring in Psychology specializing in Gender Identity problems. She asked if she could help out at our Banquet and attend a meeting. While she was helping out at our Banquet at the table out in front of the banquet room checking off attendees a man came up to her and started cursing and asking why she help those faggots and perverts. He then swept his hand across the table knocking everything off. That was her initiation into our world.
Since then she has given a picnic and a Christmas party at her house for our support group. For this now to happen to her, it just sucks!

I am a Glutton for Punishment

As if I am not doing enough to keep me busy in retirement, I just signed up for a photography class at Manchester Community College.

Advanced Seminar in Photography:
Shooting People, Places and Things
This course is designed for photographers with intermediate to advanced skill level. While studying the master photographers in each of our subjects of people, places and things, students will shoot assignments that will include landscape, night photography, people, and still life. Class time will be a combination of photographic technique, discussion of well known photographers, and critique of student work. We will work in both color and black and white. Both digital and fi lm cameras are welcome.
CRN #31628 6 Mondays (on alternate weeks; does not meet 10/8), 10/1; 10/15; 10/29; 11/5; 11/19; 12/3; 7-9 p.m. MCC Bldg. AST D229 & 2 Saturdays, 10/13 & 11/10, will meet off-campus, sites and times to be discussed in class. Fee: $140
Instructor: Mallorie Ostrowitz holds an M.F.A. from Lehman College and a B.A. in fine arts from Queens College. Her photography has been widely exhibited throughout the U.S. and can be viewed on her web site: www.mallorieostrowitz.com.

This in addition to my classes at UConn for my Masters.

Patrick’s Weekender

Patrick’s Weekender: Saturday Six - Episode 174


1. What is the most unlucky thing that has happened to you all week?
I did not have any unlucky moments this week. Mainly because a do not believe in luck.

2. Do bad things happen more often to good people or bad people?
I think more bad things happen to bad people more often because they are more careless, they take shortcuts and they do not care about others.

3. How much do you believe that you can improve your outlook in life (from a “fate” perspective) by doing good deeds and correcting past wrongs?
I think that you can improve your outlook on life by helping others. I believe in the Golden Rule: “Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do to You.”

4. Take the quiz: What will happen to you in the future?

The Quiz of Luck - What Will Happen In Your Future?

Seems like you are not in big trouble. Actually, this result is actually BETTER than average. You will have a perfect job. You will make a lot of money. The job that you will have is being a kind of doctor. You will not marry. Many (wo)men will like you or did like you in your college, but you don't think anybody is good enough for you. You will live in a two-story house when you are older. Two stories all for you is good enough for you! You will have many dinners in your house. The bad news is that you will be very lonely and sad - perhaps almost depressed when you are older. Yes, you will think that money is not everything in your life. Feel good young man. You will not bald /*_*\ Your hair will be the same as it is right now. You will feel that you are one of the prettiest/handsome (wo)man there is for your age /*_*\ You will be the over average (wo)man. In your future, nothing will hurt you. Only pain on the outside. When you are 87 years old, you will die of painful cancer. Take this quiz! Quizilla | Join | Make A Quiz | More Quizzes | Grab Code

5. Do you believe in fate, coincidence, or both?
I believe in coincidence, whe tend to notice coincidences more. I do not believe our lives are pre-ordained, I do not believe in destiny.

6. Overall, when “bad things” happen, how often do you believe the victim generally “had it coming?”
I do not believe anyone “has it coming”. I do not wish any one “ill will.”

August 18, 1920

The Nineteenth Amendment, called the Susan B. Anthony Amendment, is ratified by Tennessee on August 18. It becomes law on August 26.

Timeline of Women's Suffrage in the United States

A Little Bit of Heaven

Today I was in a little bit of heaven, I went up to Smith College Museum of Art in Northampton MA to see their Ansel Adams exhibit, need I say more?
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OK, OK, for those of you who are not photographers I will tell what is so special about Ansel Adams. You probably have seen some of his works even if you didn’t know it was by him, he has a style that is immediately recognizable. I first saw his work when my parents got me a 35mm camera for my high school graduation and they also got me a subscription to Life Library of Photography which is a series of about two dozen book that teach photography using examples from the great photographer. One of the examples that they used was Ansel Adams and as soon as I saw his work in fell in love with his works. He co-developed the Zone System for taking black and white photographs and was one of the founders of the f/64 Group. What is the f/64 Group? It is a school of photograph that set the aperture to the smallest possible opening (The opening of the camera lens) as a result the depth of field is almost infinite (Depth of Field is the range of what is in focus. Like when you take a close up of a rose and the background is all blurry, that is the result of the aperture opening.). A great example this technique is the third photograph of the Smith College web-site, Mount Williamson, notice the boulders in the very front are in perfect focus and so are the mountains way off in the distance this because of the small opening of the lens.
OK, lesson is over.

A Miss Use of Special Ed Classes

Yesterday while I was helping out at an organization that helps GLBT youth they got a phone call from a parent and the parent said that the school system where their daughter is enrolled was putting her into a Special Ed class. Not because she is disabled, not because she is a disturbance in class, not for any other reason except that she is transgenderd. She is a straight A student in Junior High School, takes part in after school activities and wants to come to school as a girl. The child has seen a psychologist and has been diagnosed with Gender Identity Disorder. The school system where they lived last year had no problem with her coming to school as a girl, but the new school system wants her to be in a Special Ed class.

Wrong! That is a violation of the state Anti-Discrimination statues. Other schools systems in the state have developed policies for transgender student that follow the CT Department of Education guidelines and this school system should also develop a policy for students with GID and not push them off into a class where they do not belong. Besides it is a lot more expense for the school system to have someone in a Special Ed than in regular classes and it is a miss use of tax payer’s monies.

Maine Trip Part 2

I just came back from dog sitting my brother’s dog in Kennebunk and this weekend while I was there I took a trip to see some of the lighthouses in the area. I went up to Portland to photograph Portland Light, the most photographed lighthouse in Maine. The lighthouse is located in Fort Williams Park. The fort was a complete surprise; I didn’t realize that the lighthouse was located around a fort that was built in 1899 and used up until 1962. The fort played a major role in the harbor defense during WW II and I found it interested because my father was stationed in such a fort during part of WW II at Fort Wright in New York’s Fisher Island.

Here are the three lighthouses that I visited this past weekend: Portland Head Lighthouse, Cape Elizabeth Lighthouse and Cape Porpoise Lighthouse.




This time when I visited Cape Porpoise I brought my camera and I took some pictures of the town pier; the dinghies, lobster traps and pots. But the photographs cannot capture the wind blowing in your hair, the smell of the salt air, the cry of the seagulls and the sound of the surf. You need to experience all the sights and sounds of a fishing village in order to really appreciate it.



Speaking of sounds…. When I was at Cape Elizabeth, I was out on the rocky shore taking pictures with a number of other tourists and a light drizzle started. I was standing next to this thing…

A fog horn when it went off. Boy was that LOUD!!! Painfully loud, can you imagine what it was like standing next to the fog horn when it is designed to be heard miles out at sea? OHOO… Ohoo.

To see all my photo of the trip click here.

Manic Monday

Manic Monday for August 13, 2007

What would you like to accomplish this month?
Not much, maybe to get a nice even tan. But on a serious side, I plan on helping out at a non-profit organization, also at CTAC for the Transgender Day of Remembrance on November 20th and also with the Fashion Show September 14th.

How would people who knew you in high school describe you?
Probability weird. This year is my fortieths reunion, if I decide to go I would probability win the award of “Most Changed”.

What's your favorite meal of the day, and why?
Breakfast because I like to see what I can make with an egg, there are just so many ways to cook an egg. But no, now that I think about it I like lunch especially making a Dagwood sandwich. On the other hand I think I really like dinner, a good meal with a nice glass a wine that I can take my time enjoying.
Heck, I think I just like good food, no matter what meal it is.

Patrick’s Weekender

Patrick’s Weekender: Saturday Six - Episode 173


1. What is your favorite flavor of chicken wings? How many do you generally order at a time?
BBQ, second best is teriyaki and I usually have less than a dozen.

2. How often do you check out a restaurant’s nutrition information before going there to have dinner?
- 0 - That was an easy question to answer.


3. If you have ever done so, what was your biggest surprise in reading the calorie or fat counts?
I think it was the calories and fat of one of those value meals. You can have two days worth of calories and fat in one meal.

4. Take the quiz: What does your pizza say about you?

What Your Pizza Reveals

Your appetite is pretty average. You don't go overboard - but you don't deprive yourself either. You aren't particularly picky about pizza. It's so good... how could you be? You fit in best in the Western part of the US. You like food that's traditional and well crafted. You aren't impressed with "gourmet" foods. You are generous, outgoing, and considerate with your choices. You are a flavorful and bold person. You should consider traveling to Spain. The stereotype that best fits you is guy or girl next door. Hey, there's nothing wrong with being average.

What Does Your Pizza Say About You?

5. What style of food do you think is generally served at what you’d consider the most romantic of restaurants?
American cuisine; I tend to think of a country inn as a romantic setting for dinning. Maybe an old converted mill along side a river down a country lane.

6. What type of food would you be likely to sample first: food that is hot and spicy or food that is more mellow but has a richer taste?
A food that is more mellow with a rich taste, hot and spicy, I think, tend to burn out your taste buds.

The Presidential Debate on the LOGO Channel

First let me say that I do not get the LOGO Channel but I have read the comments and looked at the video clips at the Human Rights Campaign web-site along with comments on trans blogs. I think it was great that the candidates sat down and talked about gay issues; I think that was a first. However; I have some issues with one of the organizers of the forum, the HRC.
We were (The Trans-community) told that there was going to be one question for each of the candidates that cover trans-issues. There was only one question asked about trans-issues and they were asked if the would fire an employee who transitioned on the job. Now that was a real thought provoking in-depth question (Sic), of course they answered no. They did ask good questions that affect the trans-community but they were phrased to cover just Gays and Lesbians. An example is that they asked about health care for same sex-couples but not about coverage for trans-individuals, there are very few companies that cover transsexuals most policies have explicit exclusion for transsexuals. Mine does have an explicit exclusion for transsexuals and that is forcing me to buy my hormones overseas due the extremely high prices for hormones if you try to buy them at a pharmacy without insurance.
Some of the important question affecting the trans-community that they could have asked are:
The Real ID Act – It will require the gender to match what is one your birth certificate. As a result when you try and get a job your name will be female but your driver’s license will say male. How many jobs do you think you would get if you looked like a woman but had a “M” on the driver’s license? Since the standard of medical care requires you to live for at least one full year in your true gender you will be virtually unemployable.
Social Security – The same issue. If you fill out your employment application as female the Social Security Administration will actually send a letter to your employer telling them of the discrepancy; in other words outing you to your employer.
Passports – Ditto
Birth Certificate – Some states do not allow them to be changed at all, some states draw a line through the old gender and write in the new gender and some like Connecticut will issue a new birth certificate and seal the old one.
I would have liked to hear their thoughts on these questions, but realistically I do not think any of the candidates would have a clue what these questions are about. I think ore than the one question should have been asked; it was a joke to call the forum a GLBT forum. Once again the “T” at the end was a “_t".

A Night Out on the Town

I got bored yesterday so I called some friends down in the New London area to go out and have a night on the town. We went to the Bulkeley House for dinner, we have been there before and the food was very good. I had Stuffed Sole with crabmeat stuffing and it was very good. The restaurant is an old 18th century tavern but it does not have any air conditioning so we sat out on the outdoor deck with a view of the New London harbor, but I was very humid sitting out on the deck.
Afterward we went to the Brass Rail Café for a drink, they have a nice deck overlooking the harbor and I was watching the ferries coming in and leaving the harbor for, Block Island, Long Island an